Piecing it Back Together
by gotz2piddle
Summary: After the final battle Snape (a bit OOC) is left broken and alone, reveling in his own misery. As his pain begins to worsen, Dumbledore worries about his well being. He calls on a healer to assist the ex-potions master. Much to Snape's dismay it turns out
1. A Healer to Assist

Thanks to a very insightful reviewer I have fixed a few problems with the Harry, Ginny, Eva thing. For those of you who don't understand, don't worry about it. Thanks so much for the reviews. They are very much welcome, even the ones that point out a mistake. They help the creative process (or whatever you want to call it). Ireally must get a beta...er!

* * *

It had been four years since last he saw her. Not long enough if you had asked him.

'_Twenty-two years I've been doing this, twenty-two. Why does he think she will do me any good now?' _Severus Snape thought to himself. These thoughts swirled about in his mind. Finally the war was over, and two months had passed since the Dark Lord had been vanquished. So why was it that Dumbledore still pestered him? Now that he had fulfilled his purpose all he wanted to do was be left alone, for all of eternity if it was possible. He had resigned from his position at Hogwarts but still remained there. Hogwarts, the epitome of all he loved and loathed had, to his great misfortune, come to be his home, and as much as he tried he couldn't bring himself to leave. But now he wanted nothing more than to depart. Unfortunately the final battle had left Severus' body in quite a state, it ached all over, and at times he would pass out from the sheer pain. Dumbledore had seen to it to have a healer come and assist him, quite against Severus' wishes of course. He now wished he had gone when he had the chance, or in his words _'escaped'_. He now found himself awaiting the arrival of his new charge, only to tell her to have off. There would be no new 'healer' at Hogwarts, especially not for him. He only hoped that his tone would scare her off, being that his body was not in the fittest of states. He was facing the wall as he tapped his fingers on the desk, and began to grow impatient. He heard the door open, it was time.

"You're late," He said in a honeyed voice.

"Only by a minute Professor," Said a voice that he somehow, vaguely remembered. Still he faced the wall.

"I'm sorry to say that your trip here has been in vain. There is no need for a healer here, nor will there ever _be_ a need for one." He said as he smirked, "That'll be all."

"I'm sorry Sir, as much as I would like to leave I can not." She answered in a voice that…how did he know it?

"What do you mean you can not? Of course you can, just-just leave."

"I'm employed by Dumbledore Sir. Only he can send me away. If you want me to leave you're going to have to take it up with him." His tactics were failing and it was pissing him off. Had he lost his touch, he used to be able to make kids cry just by staring at them, but-but now…

"I guess I'll just have to do that, and while I'm there I'll be sure to let him know how insolent you are."

"Fine." What did she mean fine, _fine_. Here she was about to lose her job, and she was _fine_. She had…well balls, he liked it, but he would never admit that, "I'll just wait here until you get back." He heard her slip into the leather chair on the other side of the desk. How dare she, without permission. Quickly he spun around to face her, ready to scream.

"What do you…" But the words were stuck somewhere around his Adam's apple. How could this be, the young woman sitting in front of him was none other than Hermione Granger, "Wh…"

"Professor, are you alright?" She asked after a moment. Snape was gaping so widely, she could practically see all of his teeth.

"Uh…yes," She had changed, subtly, but she was definitely different. At one point the most obvious thing about her was her bushy hair, now the most obvious thing was the fact that it wasn't there. Her hair was smooth and wavy, curling beautifully down to her mid-section, "Miss-Miss Granger."

"Yes sir." She answered politely, "Didn't they...um inform you about my coming."

"Well yes of course they did, but not that it would be…well you."

"Oh." She said a bit embarrassed, "I'm sorry Sir." What was she sorry about, he wondered? Then he realized that he might have offended her.

"Don't worry about it," He said trying to make his voice sound harsh. He didn't want her thinking him, _kind_. He was staring again. He couldn't believe that this girl, woman, was the same Hermione Granger.

"Listen, Sir, I know you don't want me around, but…why don't you let me try and help you. If you don't like it I'll leave." She said not noticing his gaze. Honestly she was averting his eyes, secretly she was shaking with fear and she had, somehow, kept her composure up until this point, "Kind of like a-a trial." Her voice had knocked him out of his stupor, a trial huh, that seemed…reasonable.

"Fine, Miss Granger, you can have your trial." He answered after some thought on the matter. He didn't like the idea of one of his ex-students seeing him in such a weak state but there was something appealing about the proposition, "One day, no more, no less."

"Deal."

* * *

He now sat on the lounge chair in his sitting room. She had instructed him to stay there until she got back. He had struggled greatly to move from his office to here, but he was determined to not let her see his pain.

'_She would think me weak.'_ He thought. She had however tried to help him, even after he barked at her to get back. This older Hermione definitely had more backbone then the girl he had known before. She gently wrapped her fingers around his wrist giving him just enough support and balance. He couldn't help but feel she was trying to save his dignity by not fully sustaining his body. She finally entered the room again with an armful of oils and potions, as well as her wand. He took the time to observe her attire. She was dressed in a plain black boat neck sweater, with a knee length black skirt; he liked the color on her. She had had her healer's cloak on but even he had to admit, it was quite warm in his rooms.

"I'm going to start with your arms Sir, if you don't mind." He shook his head to let her know it was okay. She walked over in front of him and bent down onto her knees. She took both of his hands and placed them face down on his thighs. While she was looking down examining his scars he took the time to scan her face. It was perfect, not a single blemish, he noticed how a few freckles ran along her nose. He took in her scent, citrus and ginseng, and let it fill his nostrils. He watched the firelight dance along her form, and noticed how it illuminated her shiny hair.

'_What am I doing?' _He tried to redirect his attention off of Hermione by looking down to see how the work was progressing, but to no avail. Her hands were so soft as they ran along his arms and massaged them. She pulled out her wand and emitted a few spells from it. Severus watched astonished, as he saw his scars disappear in front of him. She was still rubbing the oil up and down his arms and it was amazing. They had been hurting him horribly, and now he could feel the blood begin to circulate. He knew his arms would not be hurting him again for a while.

"I'm going to show you how to do this yourself, so if your arms ever begin to hurt you and I'm not around…" Her voice trailed off and Severus, who had been looking at her face again, followed her eyes downward to the one scar that she could not remove. She noticed his eyes on it too and quickly apologized, "Sorry Professor."

"Don't worry about it." He said in his soft but callous.

"When?" She asked cautiously still massaging. A piece of hair fell into her face, and he had to restrain himself from reaching out to brush it back. He felt a shiver run through him when she lightly tucked it back behind her ear. There was something extremely…_sexy_ about it.

"When I was eighteen." He answered. Why was he being so open with her? "That's when he figured I was a man."

"I…oh never mind," She said quickly.

"What? He asked puzzled.

"Well it's just, I have a strange feeling you were a man long before that." As she said this she looked up and the corners of her mouth curled into a small, quick smile. For a moment he looked into her dark brown eyes and was amazed. She seemed so deep. He couldn't ever of imagined her being like this when she was a student. Maybe he should've taken the time to get to know her. But she had been so annoying, always chirping away about something. Always with her head in a book, it was her intelligence that irritated him. But now she was a healer, she made it her job to help other people.

"How long have you been a healer?" He asked still keeping up a harsh tone.

"About a year and a half now." She answered back, "That's why I wasn't at the final battle. I was in France at the time, working at a hospital. I learned a lot but I still wish I could have been there, fighting." He watched as her eyes dulled a little. She had lost her best friend in that battle, Ron Weasley had taken an unforgivable to the chest and died on impact. Snape still couldn't help but feel sorry. As much as he had hated those three, he envied their friendship. They had been through it all. Now that Harry was an auror and doing his own thing, he understood how Hermione might feel alone. And she did, gods did she ever. Severus had remembered how there had been something between both Ron and Hermione at school, and he felt…was it jealousy.

"I'm sorry about…" But her hand had stopped him.

"Let's just not talk about it, okay," She said sweetly, but he could see the tears welling in her eyes. He didn't know what he would do if she began to cry. Lucky for him she held back. A few minutes later, to his dismay, she finished. He watched her as she gathered her things and saw how her body moved. She was certainly a woman, and her tight sweater showed her figure. She was petite and extremely skinny. She turned to face the wall where the shelves were and began placing her oils and potions there. He took the opportunity to check out her profile. He wanted to take in as much of her as he could, almost like he was never going to see her again.

She turned to face him and realized he was looking at her, it surprised her and all she could do was stand there. Finally she sensed that he had noticed her staring back, when he…did she really just see him blush. She grinned warily at him and continued to gather up her things. Finally she was ready to leave and she went over to say goodbye.

"Well Professor it has been a pleasure." She said extending her hand.

"Has it really?" He didn't enjoy the gloomy look that came upon her face, and couldn't stop himself from wanting to mend it, "You know you're quite good at what you do Hermione."

She looked up at him with surprise and smiled, "What?"

"You called me Hermione."

**The Long Day Is Over**  
Feeling tired,  
By the fire,  
The long day is over.  
The wind is gone,  
Asleep at dawn,  
The embers burn on.  
With no reprise,  
The sun will rise,  
The long day is over…


	2. Hermione's Soliloquy

Even after she had left he still couldn't get her off his mind. He had hoped that he made it clear he wanted her to come back. Her scent still lingered in the air, and as he sat amidst it he wondered what the hell he was doing. These thoughts, they were entirely inappropriate. She was, at one time, a student of his, and as much as it grieved him to say it, a best friend to Harry Potter. Oh how much he hated that boy, even after the war had ended they could not put aside their differences, _'Just like his father,' _He thought. But the way she was, the way she acted. Not like his student, but his peer, like an adult. She was an adult after all, _'No…no it's wrong.'_ He thought a shower would wash away the thoughts he was having.

After he had washed up and changed, he climbed into his comfortable bed and pulled the huge velvet blanket over his head. How soft it was, just like her hands. He wondered if all her skin was as soft and smooth as those hands had been. Of course it was. Even in sleep he couldn't get her out of his mind. He woke up the next morning in a happier mood than usual. He stretched his arms out to the sides and was surprised that he could actually do it. It had been months since he could fully extend either of his arms. Hermione really had worked miracles. He pulled on his clothing and decided to head down to the Great Hall for breakfast. Being that he was not a social man, he had not been there since he had officially resigned, seeing that there was no need for it. But just the thought that maybe Hermione would be there was enough to get his heart pumping. He turned into the Great Hall, and immediately his scanning eyes found what they were looking for. He didn't even notice they stares he got from the students as he walked through the rows of tables. On many occasions Dumbledore had ask Snape to join them in breakfast, and always he declined, _'Well, there's always a spot for you.'_ Albus had said. So when he saw Severus approaching, naturally, he was surprised.

Hermione looked up as Snape entered the hall and couldn't stop herself from smiling. Minerva had assured her that Severus wouldn't be joining them, it must have been the first time McGonagall had ever been wrong, Hermione thought.

"Good morning Professor," She greeted from behind her Daily Prophet, "I hope you slept well." She had no idea.

"Fine." Was all he had to say, but still she stared at him waiting for more, "…And how about you Miss Granger, did you sleep well?"

"Oh yes quite well," She replied. She spoke again shortly after, trying to make conversation, "I see you're back to formalities Professor."

"And what do you mean by that?"

"I'm 'Miss Granger' once again."

"Oh, yes I suppose so." He said as he took a bite of his toast, "Aren't you hungry?"

"Hm, oh no I'm not feeling well today." She answered, "Perhaps I'll eat a bit later. Uh I was wondering when you would like to see me again Professor."

"Oh, I don't know Miss Granger," He answered, "What time is good for you to begin pestering me again?"

"6:30 how does that sound?"

"Fine."

"Fine. I'll meet you at your rooms." She said as she stood up to leave, "I guess I'll see you then Professor."

"Yes. See you then." What the hell, was he actually being nice to her, in front of everyone too. He must have been losing it. Much to his astonishment he found himself moments later in his sitting room counting the seconds till 6:30.

* * *

Hermione walked off to her room. She felt so tired and weak, the massage the night before had taken her strength from her. Her arms were in so much pain. She found it quite ironic. Where she had taken away someone else's pain, she had just as easily placed it upon herself. She passed the library where, in her youth, she had spent most of her time. She did have some research to do, but decided that it could wait. She wanted to sleep for a while. When she finally got to her room, she didn't take the time to make herself comfortable. She quickly crawled under the covers and passed out. A while turned into 4 hours and she scolded herself for sleeping that long, now she barely had time to get her work done before she had to see Professor Snape.

When she finally got to Snape's rooms it was 6:29. She had run there from the library, wary to receive another tongue lashing from him. She waited there for him but he never came. She wondered if he had forgotten but feared to knock on the door. Instead she turned the knob and pushed. It was open, she dared to step inside but still he was nowhere to be found. She crossed through the office and into the sitting room. Still no Snape, finally she walked into his bedroom and there he was. Passed out, just as she had been, on the bed. She laughed silently, if he had ever caught her sleeping on the job she would have been fired. She took the time to survey him. He was much more peaceful when he slept. There were no mean scowls on his face, and he didn't try to bite your head off at every possible moment. She liked him better that way. As she examined his features, and it surprised her to find that he _was_ relatively handsome. But then she never really _looked_ at him, at least never like this. Again she laughed to herself how tacky it seemed, he was tall, dark, and handsome. Dark, definitely dark, but that was what was so intriguing about him. He was so defenseless in his sleep, when she was his student he had terrified her to no end, now here she was standing in his bedroom watching him sleep. And to her astonishment she had no fear, he really wasn't that bad. He was…tolerable. Soon her eyes began to travel around the room, there was a door in the corner and she wondered where it led. _'_No' She thought, _'It may be private,_' But to no avail. Soon her curiosity took over, and the inner girl from Hogwarts came out to play. She looked at him again, he was completely knocked out, if she was quick and kept quiet he would never know. Besides what else was she going to do before he got up? She crept over slowly and grabbed the handle, it turned with ease and she pushed it open. It made a small squeak as it opened, and Snape stirred a bit but Hermione never noticed. Instead she took a step back. It was his private library, a sea of books, and not just magical books she was surprised to find, but muggle books as well. She walked along the rows skimming the bindings with her fingers lightly; the books were precious after all. She couldn't believe the amount he had collected. She even found a section completely dedicated to Shakespearean literature. She quickly reached for Macbeth. It was her favorite muggle play; she'd seen it at least four times. She scanned the pages and found her favorite speech.

"What exactly do you think you are doing?" She jumped at the sound of the voice and dropped the book. She turned around quickly to find Snape standing at the doorway with a grimace on his face.

"Professor," She said as she bent to pick up the book, "I-I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it, I just…"

"What is that you have in your hands?" He asked as he strode over to where she was stranding. He reached out and grabbed it from her, his hand sliding against hers as he did.

"Shakespeare Sir."

"Macbeth," He was shocked, it was his favorite play, "And what, prey-tell, were you doing with it?"

"I-I was looking for Macbeth's soliloquy," She managed to stutter out.

"Ah, 'It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury sig-…'"

"'…Signifying nothing,'" Hermione finished for him, "It's my favorite." It was so dark and depressing, so unlike her, how could that be her favorite speech, he wondered. He could do nothing but stare at her, she really was so intelligent. Hermione thinking he wanted to hear more continued on.

"Sir I really am so sorry. It's just you were sleeping and I…"

"It's fine Miss Granger, let's just get this over with." He said, listlessly. She looked up at him and caught his gaze for a moment. His eyes were so dark and deep, like pools. Who knew what lie there? She was so small, he thought, almost a foot and a half shorter than him. He fought the urge to embrace her right there. She blushed as he continued to stare and began to depart from the room. As she got to the doorway he came up alongside her and put his arm out in front of her. She immediately stopped and her heart began to race. He slowly slipped the book into her hand and then left the room. After he had traveled into the sitting room she smiled. It was the little actions like that, that surprised her. Once she began to work the mood settled down. She started on his shoulders this time. She talked on about how he had stress-knots and he found that he liked the sound of her voice. It was soothing, he wasn't used to hearing anything but silence. It had been quite a long time since he had had any company around, and he didn't really mind it. This time she wore jeans and a v-necked light-pink sweater. The irony of it killed him; it was her modesty that was so sexy. She also hummed as she worked, blues songs. Many of them he knew and had to defy the impulse to hum along with her, it just wasn't in his character. Billie Holiday, Ella Fitzgerald, Macbeth how could someone her age be so knowledgeable about these things? How could someone like her ever see anything in Ronald Weasley? An odd twist of fate if you asked him. If only she was older. Her small hands kneaded his skin up and down, side to side. It felt wonderful. She was so powerful, yet so tiny.

It was a while before he noticed she had finished.

"Professor. Professor I'm finished for tonight."

"Uh, oh yes. Yes goodnight then." He said as he stood up. There it was, the shooting pain right up his left side. He couldn't stop the gasp from escaping his lips. The last thing he saw before he passed out was her running over to catch him.


	3. The Hospital Wing

When he woke it took him awhile to figure out where he was. It didn't quite believe he was in the hospital wing until he saw Madame Pomfrey scurry out from her tiny office and over to some unfortunate student.

"Glad to see you up," Hermione said as she poured a glass of water from a pitcher and pushed it towards him. Speech seemed to be lost to him and he merely shook his head, "You should drink. You're probably dehydrated." He took the glass with hesitation. He hated giving in to other people's wishes. He didn't want anyone to feel content if he, himself, was not.

"W-why…" He managed as he began to push himself upwards, into a sitting position.

"Shh. Don't strain yourself." She said softly as she began to push him back down onto the pillow gently, "Take your time." Her hands' warmth traveled through the thick black sweater he had on, and penetrated his skin. He abided with her soft commands and lay back down. When she removed her hands from his shoulders he could still feel the tingling sensation that they had imprinted on his skin. She smiled at him, pleased that he had adhered to her advice. He had not the strength to smile back, for if he had he would've.

"That was quite a nasty fall you took there." She said finally, "Although I did try to help the blow, my efforts were unsuccessful. You hit the ground hard, you dislocated your shoulder but luckily Poppy was able to mend it. You can probably be out of here tonight." She stopped but seemed as if there was more that she wanted to say. She opened her mouth and the words were there, but they would not come out. Was she scared? The question was answered moments later, "I-I oh. I might as well make use of the time while you can't speak. Professor I don't think you should push yourself as you do. I know you don't wish for anyone to see your pain, but-but how can anyone help you if they don't know anything is wrong. I-I think you should let me stay with you until you are recovered. Not just from this fall, but also from your…your other wounds." Did she really mean what she just said? Stay with him! Surely he had misunderstood her.

"I-I…"

"Ah" She said softly, "What did I say? Besides I'm not taking no for an answer." And that was it. There's was to be no fighting about it. He knew she was stubborn and found that he was too weak, or that he just didn't care, to fight it. Or maybe it was that he wanted her to stay there. Soon he fell back into a restless sleep. One full of dreams, _Ron being hit with the Advara Kedavra in the chest, Lucius Malfoy laughing with glee, Harry then going after him. Forgetting about Voldemort altogether. He remembered wondering how one person could be more important to Harry than saving all of humanity. He had never had a best friend, or anyone to love so how could he understand. He remembered throwing all his force into the spell he sent in Voldemort's direction. The Dark Lord definitely felt the full brute of it and turned on his traitor. _He would then wake up, and Hermione would be there to ease him back to sleep. He wondered why Madame Pomfrey wasn't doing her job of taking after him. Of course he didn't mind her absence, he felt strange about having his ex-student take care of him in bed like a child. But still it was comforting nonetheless. Hermione was right, after a quick check up Madame Pomfrey had found him fit to leave the ward. Hermione graciously offered her arm for support, and with great effort he took hold of it. She walked silently beside him as he limped to his rooms. As they walked his mind was at war with itself. How could he let her drag him on to his rooms. Part of him wanted to push her away and yell, _'No I can do it myself._' But another part wanted her to stay close so he could smell that scent, the citrus and ginseng. His nostrils flared as he took the smell into every corner of his being._ 'Wonderful.'_ Finally, after what seemed like hours, the grueling walk was over and they had reached his door.

When they entered the sitting room Hermione helped Snape into his armchair, and then she herself collapsed on the couch, arms falling to her sides. She allowed her eyes to close. It was a tiring job, but she knew the task ahead of her was going to be much worse. She could handle it, she thought, she had dealt with worse before.

He watched her as she rested, he could see her strength. It radiated off of her like a bright light. He wondered how he had not noticed before. Finally her eyes fluttered open.

"Oh, it's five-thirty. You must really be hungry," She said not looking at him but at the magicked alarm clock on the ledge above the fireplace, "You haven't eaten for almost a day and a half." She finally turned her head towards him, and seemed to realize what she was saying, "Hm, well you're in no fit state to be walking down to the Great Hall. Besides it would probably take us until tomorrow to get you down there. Maybe I should have the house elves bring something up for you."

"Aren't you hungry?" He managed to ask.

"Oh no. I had a big lunch this afternoon." He looked at her slim figure and wondered _how_ she could manage to fit a big lunch, "So what would you like me to send for?" After Severus had been successfully filled to the zenith with food she began to clear away the remnants he had left behind.

"You don't have to do that you know." He said with his slight edge, "That _is_ why they have house elves."

"Good to see you're getting your speech back, although I would much rather see that attitude go," She said smiling. He was abashed, she had never spoken to him like that before, "Besides I feel bad leaving it here. Why should those poor elves have to do everything just because some people are too lazy to do it themselves?" What was she talking about? She actually cared about the house elves. He had never heard anyone speak of them in such a way before. "They're helping me, so the least I could do is clean up a little."

"But they get offended don't they?" He asked.

"Well some yes. But that is only because they were brought up that way." She answered, "Made to think that their only existence is to serve humans. A life of servitude is not a life at all if you ask me." She made a good point.

"You seem to have thought this over. When did you start feeling so…passionately for house elves?"

"Oh, ha, well I-I started this group when I was still a student here."

"Oh, and what was that?"

"S-P-E-W"

"What? Spew?"

"Yes, it supported freedom for house elves."

"Did you actually free any house elves?" He asked interested.

"Well yes. One. Dobby, he was the Malfoy's elf. He had tried to protect Harry third year. Oh anyway, Harry freed him. Although I'm not quite sure that counts." She answered. They went on like this for a few more hours. Dumbledore stopped in at one point to say hello. Snape was quite annoyed, but once Hermione had accepted her third lemon drop, Dumbledore found it was time to leave. They continued to talk again after he had departed. Severus found that he truly was interested in what she was saying. She showed so much passion, especially when it came to things he wouldn't have expected. She was a lot deeper than he thought she was. It was quite unexpected. He had thought her only a bookworm, never truly _reading_ the words she read. Never really _learning_ the things she learned, so naturally he was surprised to find how profound she was.

"Oh my." Hermione exclaimed, "It's eleven o'clock. We've been talking for almost five and a half hours." Snape hid his surprise well. He couldn't remember a time when he had talked with a person for so long. "I guess its time we turned in, huh?"

"Huh, oh yeah…yeah." He answered.

"Uh, where…where do you want me to sleep?" Hermione asked.

"Oh, I guess I can make you up a cot…just uh, stay here I'll be right back."

"Where are you going?"

"I'm just going to run in my bedroom for a moment."

"A-are you sure you can make it."

"Yes, I think I'll manage."

"Okay. Just take your time." Did she really care? Why? He stood up, slowly, and limped his way to his bedroom. He could feel her eyes on him so he did as he was asked and took his time. He grabbed his wand from his bedside table and began the journey back to the sitting room. His frustration built up with every step he took. It was just taking too long. Finally he turned back into the sitting room, and the image there relieved his frustration in a moment. Hermione, it seemed, couldn't wait for him to draw up the cot. Instead she had laid her head on the arm of the couch and drifted into a peaceful sleep. He decided that since she was already sleeping that he might as well go to bed. But something stopped him. He crept over to where she was laying and grabbed the blanket that was draped over his armchair, then he magicked up a pillow. Softly, he lifted her head and placed it upon the pillow. Her hair was so soft. Certainly not the nest it had been before, she had somehow learned to tame it since then. 'Nox' he said quietly, and soon the lights in the room were all out except for the fire that was still burning on. Then he once again retreated back into his bedroom. He was quite shocked at his calmness. A former Hogwarts student was resting peacefully on his couch. A young, beautiful Hogwarts student. Not only that but a Gryffindor, and he had absolutely no problem with it. He lowered himself onto his bed and fell into a dreamless, yet tranquil sleep.

* * *

Hermione shot up quickly into a sitting position. She looked around and tried to get her bearings. She finally realized she was in Snape's sitting room. She fell back down onto the couch. She must have fallen asleep when he went to his bedroom to get his wand. She rolled onto her side and stared at the glowing embers in the fireplace. Slowly she began drifting back into sleep, but a small moan brought her back to consciousness. _Was that what woke me up?_ She wondered. She stood up and tiptoed her way to Snape's room. She pushed the door open and it creaked loudly. Hermione thought about how old the school must have really been. She scanned the room and found Snape sleeping on his bed. It was quite a hard feat, trying to see. The room was a sea of black, and the night belonged to a new moon. There was no light shining through his windows. Hermione tripped over a number of things before finally reaching his bedside. She squinted her eyes to see clearly. He had his left arm up over his head, and the right arm was wrapped his body. He looked almost child-like. He wasn't awake, but she worried that he might have pain throughout the rest of the night, finally, after much debate with herself she decided she would have to spend the rest of the night in his room. She reached inside her pocket and pulled out her wand. She drew up a small cot in a corner of the room, quietly, as to not wake her professor. She knew if he were to stir, he would not be happy to have been seen in such a vulnerable position. She slipped her small body under the covers, and took one last look at the professor. How could such a severe man sleep so peacefully? He seemed kind of…nice in his sleep. She laughed silently to herself, _'If only Harry and Ron could see him like this.'_ Slowly the smiled drained from her face. She missed her friends greatly, especially Ron. She had seen Harry shortly after the last battle. She could remember it still. _She had greeted him with such glee, running over to hug him, but he flinched away from her touch. She had stepped back to look into her friends eyes and knew, there would be no need for him to tell her, 'W-where's Ron Harry? Wh-where is he?' Harry looked her in the eyes which were now welling with tears, 'Harry wh…no,' she had said shaking her head, hands coming up to cover her face. Harry took a step forward and tried to embrace her, but this time it was her who stepped away from the gesture. 'D-did he…did he fight?' she asked, and Harry understanding the question nodded, 'Yeah.' He said, 'Yeah, he did good. He fought till the end. He…he never gave up.' Harry tried, weakly, to smile at her. 'Good.' Was all she could say, 'Good.'_

Hermione found that she had tears running down her face. She brought her hand up and, unceremoniously, wiped them away. She was angry with herself. It had been months now since Ron had died, and besides she now had a task ahead of her that would take all of her attention and energy. There was no time for this childishness she was stronger than this. She laid her head down on the pillow and instantly dropped off to sleep. Unfortunately she had not fully thought the whole idea through, for she did not know how Snape would take her being in his room.


	4. Don't Leave

Snape rolled over to the other side of his bed, facing the window. The bright sun was shining in on him and he blinked his tired eyes open. He smiled a little bit, there was a dark brown owl sitting on a perch outside of his window. He stared into its hazel brown eyes and it reminded him of someone…her, he couldn't deny it, everything reminded him of her. Hermione, Hermione…

"_Hermione!_" He yelled when he noticed the girl. Her body shot up quickly. So quickly her hair fell out of its ponytail and went flying around her in a mess of curls. Severus noticed how exquisite she looked, even in her disheveled state, but he was too angry to allow it to fully register. She spoke almost before she had awoken.

"_Yes Professor,"_ She said rapidly.

"Yes Professor…_Yes Professor! _Is that all you have to say for yourself?" She merely gawked at him as he rose out of his bed and walked over to face her, "Huh? Out with it girl."

"Uh…Professor what are you…"

"Don't, don't even ask that question. You were supposed to be the smartest student in your whole class." He said directing every ounce of anger her way. He was totally embarrassed to find her there. He wondered if he had been snoring, or drooling. He was determined to make her pay for being there, "I want to know why you are in my bedroom. Perhaps you were not at the top of your class, but maybe that choice was fixed. After all you are the best friend of _Mr. Potter_." His very hatred for the boy oozed from the last two words he had spoken. He found he was a bit calmer. He hadn't even started in on her yet, but he felt he had succeeded in upsetting her. That was good enough.

"Excuse me _Professor_," She said trying to mimic him, "But _do not_ question my intelligence. You did quite enough of that while I was a student here. And besides you know damn well I deserved that honor. Ha! Christ, it's the only honor I've ever received that I actually gave two shits about." She said standing up to face him. She put her finger up level with his face, which now wore a shocked expression, "Also do not talk about my only remaining best friend like he's some foul being. He is a good man, and if you would just stop being so-so hard headed and cruel you would see that."

"I-I…" The words were stuck in his throat, somewhere close to his Adam's apple.

"I was in here," She continued, "Because I wanted to make sure you would be okay throughout the night. I'm sorry for doing my job." Her outburst had been so unexpected. Snape was surprised that he found this to be a turn-on. By now she had already stormed into the sitting room, where she grabbed the few things she had there and shoved them into a bag, "I fear I will not be returning." She said as she turned to face her old Professor. She had just reached out for the door handle when his hand shot out and grabbed her wrist.

"Why?" He asked almost by accident. Her faced turned up and she looked into his far-seeing eyes. She had never noticed how tall he was.

"W-why what?" She asked forgetting, for a moment, what they were fighting about.

"Why…why do you choose to-to look after me if you could have just as easily… Oh never mind just leave."

"No." She said letting go of the handle, but not moving from her spot, "Tell me." Her harsh tone had faded away. Snape was surprised to find that she had even had it in her to be so-so like him. Now she sounded rather docile. He hesitated before answering. He didn't want to open himself up too much to her, but in the end he couldn't resist.

"You and your friends, you never liked me when you were here. Why would you stick around to try and help me if you can't even stand to be in my presence?"

"Well as a matter-of-fact," She said placing a hand on her hip. Severus had always thought this simple gesture to be so sexy. It defined her curves. Hermione, it was obvious, had grown into a natural beauty. She had a way of being modest and unadorned that made her seem even more attractive than she already was, "I-I did like you when I went here. And honestly I spent most of my time defending you from those two." Her heart ached once again at the thought of Ron, and the ever-attentive Snape did not miss the fleeting look that had passed over her features. "You can't blame them you know. You were kind of…an asshole." He wanted to laugh at this; he was still shocked to find that she had really grown up.

"Well, I think that's fifty points from Gryffindor." He said. Hermione snorted at his attempt to make a joke, and for a moment he smiled.

"You know," She said, placing her bag down on the table, "You two are so alike it's scary."

"Who?"

"You and Harry. Maybe that's why you never got along."

"What!" He asked shooting a very confused look at her. How could he be anything like Potter?

"I know why you hate him," She said, "It's because of his father, but perhaps you could take into consideration that Harry _is not_ James." He merely stared at her dumbstruck, "Besides who would know better than me? I am his best-friend." She made a good point. Who would know better than her?

"And what could have possibly brought this to your attention now, of all times, Ms. Granger?"

"Well when you made that joke. I-I don't know it just reminded me of him." She answered, "Whenever I was angry or upset, usually with Ron, he would always try to make me smile. Huh…it was just nice of you that's all." She had had to be kidding; certainly no one had ever deemed him, Severus Snape, to be…nice.

"Somehow I find that to be quite impossible Ms. Granger." He retorted. He had completely forgotten the pain in his knees until now. Now he felt his legs turning to jelly under the weight of his body. Hermione had caught this almost a moment before he did, and was next to him in a flash. She pulled his arm around her shoulders, which Severus had failed to notice, until now, were just the right height for such a purpose. She walked him over to his lounge chair and sat him down gently. For being a woman capable of such hostility with her words, it seemed that, when it came to her touch, she was quite incapable of being anything other than tender. Severus thought about how much of a contradiction she was.

"Nothing is." She said propping his feet up on the ottoman.

"What?" He asked extremely confused.

"Nothing is impossible." She answered him looking up into his eyes for a brief moment, "Highly improbable, yes, but impossible…I don't think so." She began pulling her things back out of her bag again.

"Looks like you're not going anywhere." He said with a smirk.

"You know just because you got your way does not mean that you can act like a pompous ass." She said grinning.

"Who says I got my way?" He answered still joking.

"Oh so you _want_ me to leave." She said standing up.

"No!" He said, reaching out, once again, to grab her wrist, "Don't leave." He looked up at her from where he was seated, and almost stared a hole right through her. He had unshielded himself, made himself vulnerable, for just a moment. What she saw in the depths of his eyes was almost terrifying. She had known that he had been hurt in the past, but it was more than that, he was traumatized. She saw all of this in a glimpse and then it was gone. He looked down at where he held her wrist and seemed shocked at his outburst. He slowly released her arm where there were now florid bruises. She was surprised as well, for she had been so entranced by his look that she did not feel the shooting pain go up her arm. Not until now at least. She extended her fingers trying to get the feeling back into her, now numb, arm.


	5. Blower's Daughter

The lyrics of the song are not mine, although I wish they were. The song is called _The Blower's Daughter_ by Damien Rice, and it is quite possibly the best song ever. Check it out at It's really strange because I chose this song out of my sheer love for it, not really for the lyrics. But I find that they just fit so perfect with the scene. When it says, 'The pupil in denial,' it reminds me of Hermione. How she knows she feels something for Snape but is denying it to herself. Also she _was_ a pupil of his at one time. Also how it repeats 'I can't take my eyes/mind off of you,' Snape just cannot seem to stop looking at and thinking about Hermione. There is more meaning to the song. If you will allow me to elaborate (I guess you kind of have to being as I'm the one writing this.) When Hermione sings, 'Life goes easy on me. Most…of the time,' there is a hidden meaning to that. Hm…is she having some kind of internal struggle of her own. Maybe, you'll just have to read on to find out.

* * *

"I-I'm sorry." He said as he placed a hand over his eyes. He had known that in that one fleeting glance he had shown her more about himself than he had ever wanted anyone to know, "I don't know what got into me. I-I don't know…"

"It's okay." She said kneeling down, trying to reconnect the eye contact. She knew his recovery would take much more than just the physical healing, "Professor?" She was trying to get his attention. He looked at her but this time his dark eyes were back behind their mask, "I'm not going anywhere," She was trying to reassure him. What was it that she had said that had caused such an eruption on his part? She had her hand on his left knee, and she patted it gently.

They sat there like that for hours. Hermione still trying to comfort her old potions master, yet still walking on eggshells as to not impede on him. Finally, out of habit she began to hum. Severus found that her voice was not nearly as annoying as he had thought it was. Once again he knew the song and fought against his will to hum along. Soon she began to sing the words softly, almost inaudible at first. She did it quite unintentionally, but was now lost in her own mind. She, for a moment, forgot where she was, what she was doing. It just seemed to come naturally…

"And so it is," She began softly…

"Just…like you said it would be,  
Life goes easy on me,  
Most…of the time." Her voice rose just a little.

"And so it is…  
The shorter story,  
No love no glory…  
No hero in her sky,  
I can't take my eyes off of you…  
I can't take my eyes off of you,  
I can't take my eyes off of you,  
I can't take my eyes off of you,  
I can't…take my eyes off of you,  
I can't take my eyes…" Her voice faded out, and the fear of her stopping made Snape flinch just a little. He wanted her to sing forever. He didn't want her to ever stop. Hermione did not notice his reaction, but still she continued to croon him.

"And so it is,  
Just like you said it should be,  
We'll both forget the breeze,  
Most…of the time.

And so it is…  
The colder water…  
The blower's daughter,  
The pupil in denial,  
I can't take my eyes off of you…  
I can't take my eyes off of you,  
Ican't take my eyes off of you,  
I can't take my eyes off of you,  
I can't take my eyes off of you,  
I can't take my eyes off of you,  
I can't take my eyes…I…I…" This time she did stop. His heart was ripped from him when she became silent. He wished so much for her to continue. Internally he begged for it. He looked down to see why she had stopped only to find her head resting gently against his right thigh. She had fallen to sleep. They had been sitting there for so long and now as Severus looked out his little window he realized just how long. He watched as the purples, and blues, and pinks of the sunset illuminated his dark, cold sitting room. No it wasn't the light from outside that made it seem brighter. It was something in his very room, something so close he could touch it. She was his sun, _his_ light, whether she knew it or not. But no, she would never be his, because just like the sun, if he got too close he would be burned. Burned in a way that could never be healed. Still she slept on peacefully, Severus had no want to move, he didn't want to wake her, and so he stayed there. He brought his hand up and lightly traced a finger around her face, pushing back a curl that had fallen haphazardly into her eyes. Tracing around her eyes, those eyes that he saw staring back at him at every moment of everyday, even in his dreams. Her nose, the most perfect little nose he had ever seen. Her lips, the ones he wished to caress with his own. But that could never happen, would never happen. But he allowed himself to be content for the moment, he was happy here. Happy? Had he ever really been happy? How could such a woman do this to him? Still tracing her face and feeling her soft brown curls he picked up on the song, right where she had left off.

"Did I say that I love you?  
Did I say that I want to,  
Be there holding on?  
I can't take my mind off of you…  
I can't take my mind off of you,  
I can't take my mind off of you,  
I can't take my mind off of you,  
I can't take my mind…off of you,  
I can't take my mind…  
My mind…  
My mind…  
Till I find somebody…new." He knew, in that moment, he would never find somebody new. No one, _no one_, had ever had this kind of effect on him. He had completely opened himself up to her in one brief moment. How could he have been so stupid, she surely was not as dumb as he was? She had seen his inner most fear and terror in that look. You would have had to be blind to miss it. He was not like her, he shielded his emotions, his past, like a treasure. It was actually more like a burden. But her, her emotions shone through her eyes like a beacon. She allowed herself to be vulnerable and open to everyone. He was wise enough to know this kind of action could lead someone to be hurt, but still he envied her for her braveness. His eyes were locked in on her oval shaped face. How could so much beauty radiate from one person, even in sleep? He was no longer annoyed with his constant thoughts of her, actually he had found them to be a much needed respite from his other thoughts, the thoughts that haunted him always, at least before her.

As Severus began to nod off he heard a strange, distant sound. Slowly he came to his senses and began to worry. _'What the hell is that?'_ He wondered. Hermione as well had come to consciousness. She blinked her eyes open and then, as if realizing something began rummaging through her bag. The place where she had had her head now tingled, and sent a warming sensation throughout Severus' body. He now felt naked and abandoned. Her just being there near him made him feel safe. Now that feeling was gone.

"What is that?" He asked as Hermione pulled a shiny metallic looking contraption from her bag. The object was exerting the strange noise. It was some sort of monophonic song.

"It's a cell phone." Hermione answered as she rubbed the sleep away from her eyes. She flipped the thing open and began to talk into it, "Hello?" She said.

"What is a…?" Severus began but was interrupted by Hermione's hand.

"Harry!" She exclaimed, "Where have you been? I've been calling you for weeks." It went on like this for a while, her chatting into the little shiny thing, and Severus sitting there watching her. "Uh-huh," she said, "Sure I'd love to. Okay I'll see you then. Yes-yes I love you too." _Love. Love!_ She close the, whatever it was called, and turned to face Snape. She sighed and then spoke in a cheerful tone to him, "That was Harry. He's been away on some Auror business. He was in Spain for a bit, dealing with some runaway death eaters. He's back though." She stopped suddenly noticing Snape's curiosity towards the object in her hand.

"What is a…cell phone?" He proceeded to ask, this time he was not interrupted.

"Oh, it's a muggle object. Very useful actually," she said also staring at it. "It allows people to contact each other through the use of phone lines. Uh…Do you know what phone lines are?" She asked. Snape reluctantly shook his head no. After she had explained to him fully about what phone lines were, jeez she really didn't skimp out on anything; she then continued to enlighten him on what a cell phone was. She found it quite funny she hadn't ever had to explain this before. Of course Harry knew what a cell phone was, he was raised in the muggle world just as she, "I got one so my family and I could contact one another, oh and Harry, obviously."

"But-but how does it work here?" He asked still bewildered by it all.

"Oh well I had to cast a charm on it. Being as there are no phone lines around for miles, I had to make the signal a bit stronger. And since electronics do not work within the Hogwarts grounds, well I had to do another charm for that too." She answered with an awkward smile.

"It's quite remarkable," he said reaching his hand out. Hermione place the object in his hand and he began to inspect it.

"Yes-yes it is. Muggles aren't as dim-witted as some might wish to believe." She answered neutrally.

"That is not what I meant Miss Granger." He said without looking up, "I meant about the charms you placed on it. Very advanced, but I guess you are…you, and I shouldn't be surprised." She unwittingly blushed. He had never openly praised her before. It was nice to here him say something pleasant for a change. He handed the cell phone back to her. "So what did Mr. Potter want?"

"Oh since he's back in town he wanted to know if I wanted to go get a drink with him." She answered, "I'm just so glad he's safe." At this she wrapped her arms around herself, forming a protection. Not only around her body but her mind. Snape merely nodded. "W-would you like to join us?" She asked hesitantly. She was being cautious, not wanting to cause another outburst like before.

"I don't think so Miss Granger," He said snidely, "But I'm sure you and lover boy will have a good time without me."

"Lover boy? Ha, that's a laugh. What would ever give you that idea?" She asked giggling.

"'_I love you,'_" he mimicked.

"Oh please Harry is like my brother. It could never be that way between us. Besides it would be too weird." She answered. After a few moments of silence she finally spoke again, Uh well…I, uh, better get going then. Don't want to be late."

"Yes of course. I will see you tomorrow."

"Okay," she answered simply enough as she grabbed her bag and retreated to the door. "Are you sure you don't want to go?" She asked once more.

"I'm sure. Thank you for asking though." He answered.

She smiled at him and said, "Well the offer is still on the table if you change your mind. We will be in Hogsmeade. You shouldn't have any trouble finding us." And with that she smiled and left the room.


	6. Lunch With Harry

"So how's it going working with Hogwart's biggest resident prat?" Harry asked after he and Hermione had greeted one another. They had had a very exciting reunion, but now they found themselves sitting in the Hog's Head sharing a pitcher of butterbeer.

Hermione clicked her tongue in response to his remark, "Now Harry, he's really not that bad."

"Not _that_ bad."

"I think it takes a lot of patience for him to let someone take care of him. He's being a lot less resistant then I thought he would be. Almost friendly." She said. Harry leaned back clutching at his chest.

"Oh my Lord! Snape _friendly_, I think I just might die." He said laughing. Hermione hit him playfully.

"Oh stop it. Let's get off the subject."

"Why!" Harry whined, "I've waited years for some awesome dirt on my hated potions master. Now I have you, my best friend, on the inside." Jokingly he grabbed her by the shoulders and began shaking her gently, "Give me what I want woman." Hermione giggled and just shook her head, "Hey!" Harry said, "Something's going on here. What is…huh! Ooh!"

"What?" Hermione asked.

"You like him."

"Of course I do. He's nice to me…well most of the time."

"No, no, no I mean you _like_ him." Harry replied smiling devilishly.

"What!" Hermione said once again, but this time with a different tone, "Harry that time you spent over in Spain with those other Aurors must have really gone to your head. You're insane."

"Am I?" Harry questioned.

"You must be to even consider such a thing." She replied not letting her true emotions get a hold of her. True she _had_ felt _something_ for Snape, but it hadn't been anything big. "What is going on with you anyway? You are extremely playful this afternoon."

"Ah, I see what you're doing. Trying to get me off the subject are you?" He said with a grin, "I'll let it go for now, but only because I have so much to tell you about Spain."

"Ooh! Was it as beautiful as everyone says it is?"

"Well, actually I didn't really have much time to enjoy the sights, although the parts I did see were quite spectacular."

"Why didn't you have much time? Were you busy doing work for the Aurors?"

"Well no…I kind of…met someone Hermione." He said looking down at his interlaced hands. He looked up over the rims of his glasses waiting for a response. It took a while for her brain to process it correctly. It had been almost two years since Harry had actually been in a relationship. After Ron had died Hermione thought Harry would always be there for her. Shortly her mind dwelled on a time not to long after their seventh year.

_Hermione had just received the news that she could begin her studies to become a healer, and Harry had just been accepted into Auror training. Ron had been the last to decide on what it was he wanted to do, so naturally he hadn't applied for anything. They had all met up at headquarters because both Harry and she were to be leaving soon to start their studies. None of them knew when they would see each other again. It was a happy new beginning for them and yet a very sad ending. The first night there Hermione lay in bed thinking about how great her day had been. The three had talked for hours about nothing and about everything. As she began to drift off she heard a small knock on her door. She rose slowly and glided over to the door not making a sound. When she opened it she found both Harry and Ron standing there in their pajamas with pillows in hand._

'_That damn elf keeps hovering over us when we're trying to sleep,' Ron had mumbled._

'_I don't think it likes us here.' Harry joined in, 'I must say Hermione it is quite hard to fall asleep when someone is watching you.' She didn't make them ask, she knew what it was they wanted. So she turned and walked toward her bed and left the door open behind her. They took the sign and followed suit. That night Hermione slept comfortably been the two loves of her life. Never had she had a better sleep then that night. For the next two weeks they did this, and not once did she make them give a reason for why._

"Hermione…Hermione!" Harry almost shouted. She awoke from her stupor. This news shattered her heart to pieces, but she knew she could never let him know that.

"Oh…oh Harry I'm sorry. I-I…Wow! That's just wonderful. Who is she?" She said feigning enthusiasm.

"Her name is Eva," He answered not noticing her initial reaction, "And she is amazing."

'_Hmph. Yeah I bet she is.'_ Hermione thought to herself.

"She was in Spain visiting her family, and…and, oh Hermione I'm in love." He said reaching across the table and grabbing her hands. "I mean I'm really, truly in love. It's…indescribable."

"Ha." Hermione laughed unenthusiastically. She felt like she had to make some sort of reaction, at least one besides anger, resentment, or sadness. "That's fabulous Harry. I'm so happy for you." She fought, damn, she fought hard to keep the tears back, but her pain flooded out through her words. Harry would have known how she felt, even if that single tear hadn't ran slowly down her face. "_I'm so happy for you._" She echoed in a whisper.

"Oh, Hermione," Harry said before standing and pulling his friend into a hug. "I knew it was too soon. I shouldn't have said anything." He spoke into her hair.

"No Harry." She replied pulling away from him. "No, I'm just being selfish. You deserve to be happy. I'm just…just surprised that's all." At this she forced a smile. A lopsided, awkward smile.

"Yes but after Ron, and all that happened with your parents…I'm sorry." It's true both Ron's and her parent's deaths had come within three weeks of each other. Being as her parents had no visible significant affect on the wizarding world their deaths had been an oversight. No one had mentioned them in the Daily Prophet or consoled Hermione. No one knew, or even cared except those close to her. She had been shocked when they died. A car accident had taken their lives; the shocking part was just how…muggle it had been. During the time of Voldemort she had been sure that if they were ever to die it would be at the end of a wand. After he had been defeated she was positive that they would be safe. When she eventually let her guard down over them, they were taken from her.

She tried to pull away more but he kept her there tightly. Little did he know that that was just what she needed. When he held her there with defiance, she knew someone loved her, cared for her. She fell back into his arms.

"It's okay. It's all okay." She said, "I'll be okay."

"I never doubted that you would be." He said, "Not for a second little sister." She looked up and a smile spread across her water stained face. Harry brought his hand up and brushed away the remaining tears. He then kissed her forehead and steered her back into her seat. He waved cautiously over to Madame Rosmerta who had been watching them intently. "I think we're going to need something a bit stronger." He said and she quickly turned and walked toward the bar, apparently understanding exactly what he meant. Soon she returned with two pitchers filled with firewhiskey. Hermione couldn't hide her anticipation as she reached out to pour herself a glass. Harry giggled at her and proceeded to also pour himself some. After taking a few shots between the two of them Hermione decided it was time to turn in.

"I will see you soon 'Mione." Harry said in his brotherly-like tone after they had reached the door to Hogwarts. "You know where to find me." He reached out and once again pulled her into a hug. He kissed her chastely on the lips and began to walk away. Hermione turned her back to him and retreated down to the dungeons.

Severus Snape stood staring out a window on the third floor. He had watch intently, the actions that took place between the "golden boy" and his very own assistant. Since the time he had resigned he had not left the dungeons for any purpose other than to get breakfast. Now that he was here he knew why. There were students that were still roaming the corridors and when they came across the myth that was Snape began to whisper behind their small hands. He hated them, all of them. How could he have ever chose teaching as a profession? There were times when he wished he could just wring their little necks. Although he doubted Dumbledore would ever allow that. He watched as Harry kissed Hermione and then turned to walk away. For a moment she tilted her head up to the sky, and with eyes closed she took a deep breath. In this short moment Severus observed the small lines running along her face. The evidence of tears. What was it that could have possibly made her cry. She had been so elated when she found out _he_ was back, but now she had been crying. If Harry had done anything to make her cry Severus vowed to make him pay for it. He watched her as she finally retreated indoors. He stood there for a while longer reveling in his own misery. Eventually he turned and began his own stroll down to the dungeons. He knew Hermione would be waiting there for him and he wasn't sure whether he should relish or detest that fact. He was becoming a contradiction of himself.


	7. Not Good Enough

When Hermione reached Snape's room she was surprised to find he wasn't there. It didn't seem strange that he would be out, perhaps he needed to talk to Dumbledore, or just needed a walk. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror atop the mantle piece.

"Oh Lord Hermione," She exclaimed to herself, "You really must clean yourself up." With this she turned to the bathroom and shut the door behind her. Once again she stared in the mirror and the look that spread across her face was sheer disgust. _'What a mess,'_ She thought. She could hardly bear to look at herself. She pulled the tie from her hair unceremoniously, and began to scrub the tear stains off of her face. She didn't hear the door to the room open and continued with her cleansing. When she had finished with washing her face she looked up to see the results. _'Still not good enough,'_ she criticized, "Never…never good enough," this time she whispered out loud. Unbeknownst to her, her ex-potions professor and patient lingered just outside of where she stood, and had just happened to catch on her words. Slowly, painstakingly she peeled her clothes off her body. Why? Why did she feel so dirty? She reached up to grab a black silk robe off the back of the bathroom door, just barely reaching it as she stood on her tip-toes. Precisely when she decided she would take a bath there was a small tap at the door.

"Miss Granger?" She heard Snape say. The barrier that the door made between them actually made his voice sound…soft. "Miss Granger, are you alright?" She strode over to the door, and when Snape heard the lock unclick he stepped back a bit. He was surprised to find that she was outfitted in his black robe, and probably nothing else. He also found that the robe looked much better on her than on him.

"Professor?" Hermione said noticing his eyes on her, "Oh Professor I'm sorry," She said looking down at the robe, realization hitting her. "I was just planning on taking a quick bath. There was nothing else…"

"It's quite alright Miss Granger," Snape said interrupting her, "But you didn't answer my question."

"What was that?" She asked.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, yes quite fine," She answered all too quickly. She felt so dumb standing there in front of him. She really must have looked like a child to him. Like a deer in headlights. It seemed that was all she had to say on her behalf. Her mind raced as she thought of things to say, but there was nothing. She knew that she was not alright but something kept her from telling Snape. She wanted to tell him, wanted to scream it at him, but something stopped her. She finally blurted out the only thing that could come to her mind, "What happened earlier with you?" She asked already regretting her words.

"What do you mean," Snape implored knowing just exactly what she meant.

"Well…when you asked me not to leave. It seemed almost as if…as if you were scared." She said. What was going on, only hours ago this had been the very same woman who had stood up to him. Now she seemed extremely naïve, almost like a child again. At this thought Snape wanted nothing more than anything to reach out and hold her, much like he had earlier that day.

"It must have been all the excitement," He was making up excuses, "From our fight I mean." Hermione merely nodded and he continued. "Perhaps it was some of the potion Poppy had given me still lingering about."

"I suppose." She said not entirely convinced.

"How was your date?"

"It was not a date." She said a little bit rashly.

"Whoa, sorry," He said putting his hands up in defense.

"I…I'm sorry Professor. I-I don't know, today has just been…" She just sighed, "It's just been one of those days." She was looking at her feet while wringing her hands together.

"I understand," He answered, "I…uh guess I'll let you get back to your bath,"

"Huh…oh, oh yeah. And Professor…thank you

"For what?"

"For being concerned," She answered, "No one really has been for a while." She was flustered after she had said this. She didn't mean for such a self-pity comment to slip from her lips.

"I find that hard to believe Miss Granger. Extremely hard to believe."

"You'd be surprised." Was all she had to say.

* * *

Hermione placed a wet foot down on the bathroom floor. She had just spent the good part of a half hour in the tub. She hadn't done it on purpose, she had just zoned out. When she had noticed the magicked clock hanging on the wall she was shocked to find she had been in there for so long.

"Shit!" She exclaimed to herself as she grabbed a towel off the back of the door. Quickly she dried herself off and pulled the black robe on again. When she exited the bathroom she found it was dark. _'Severus must have gone to bed.'_ She thought to herself, _'Severus? Since when do you call him that?'_ She quickly let this thought go from her mind and focused on how she was glad he was asleep. It was probably better for his recovery. He needed his rest. When she thought about sleep she realized how inviting it seemed. She grabbed her folded clothes out of her bag and started walking back to the bathroom, where she planned to change. But all too quickly, lethargy overtook her body and she collapsed on the couch. She sat there for a while staring into the flames of the fire. She was jolted out of this reverie by a loud grumbling sound that was echoing from inside her stomach. The realization came to her that she was still in a bath robe and nothing else. _'Well if Severus came out right now I think he'd have a few questions about this.' _She thought, _'There you go calling him Severus again. Get a grip girl.'_ Almost as she thought this, Snape stepped out of the shadows of his bedroom and into Hermione's line of vision. He raised an eyebrow at her, and she could understand why. She was curled up on the couch in the fetal position staring idly into the fire, and she was clad in a silk robe, _his_ silk robe. Slowly she sat up, her damp hair cascading down her back. She had been averting his eyes, but one look into the dark brown orbs and she couldn't stop it. The tears began to flow freely and she had absolutely no control over her actions. She was still sitting on the edge of the couch and he was staring down at her. She covered her face quickly with her cupped hands. She couldn't bear to look at him, he was probably scrutinizing her very closely. Knowing him he was probably disgusted by the sight before his eyes. That was she was surprised to feel his hands grab hold of her shoulders. He was much stronger than she had believed him to be. Perhaps her therapy sessions were doing more for him than was visible. He used his left hand to try and pry Hermione's hands away from her face, but to no avail.

"Hermione. Hermione, what's wrong." He asked. She could hear the tension and concern in his voice, but still her guard was up. "Pl-please Hermione, please. Tell me what is wrong." Slowly she pulled her hands from her face. She was sniffling uncontrollably and her head felt like it was about to explode.

"H-Harry." She managed to stutter out, "Harry has a girl friend."

"S-so what does that mean?" Severus asked confused, "I thought you two weren't…"

"We're not," She blurted out. She didn't mean to sound so harsh, but at the moment she had so much anger within herself and she couldn't help it. "B-but now I have…no one."

"What do you mean Hermione. Of course you have someone. Harry's your best friend and he would never leave you."

"Don't you understand?" She asked looking up into his eyes. He was now kneeling, but his tall stature gave him an advantage over Hermione who was petite. "Everyone leaves me," Through her crying fit, somehow she had managed to produce a tissue box which now sat next to her on the couch. She held a tissue to her nose as she talked. "Everyone. First Krum, then Ron, my parents, and now Harry."

"Those people didn't leave you Hermione, they all loved you, well with the exception of Krum, but did you really need him?" He implored, "But Ron, your parents. I bet they would have done anything to have stayed with you if they could have. It is not their faults that they died Hermione, and it is especially not yours." She had never been lost for words before, Hermione the resident know-it-all of Hogwarts Academy, dumbfounded by her very own potions professor. She didn't know if it was his speech or his manner that had surprised her the most, but more than anything she wanted to hug him. "And when it comes to Harry, he will never leave you. Take it from me Hermione, I saw the way you three, Ron, Harry, and yourself, acted together while here at school, and even at headquarters." She stared at him still speechless. She had thought he had just ignored them when they were at Sirius' house. Hadn't he considered them an annoyance. Why would he have taken the time to notice anything about their behavior towards one another? "I saw how they treated you, like a little sister. They would have done anything for you if you had asked. Which I know you wouldn't have." She smiled through her tears at his last words.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It means I know that there isn't anything that you can't do yourself." His words of kindness were what did it for her. If it weren't for the fact that she was sitting down she just might have collapsed again. Slowly he raised his hand up to wipe away her tears. She needed someone to hold her, she needed comfort. And when it came down to it, she didn't mind that Snape was the only person there to do it. Out of the blue her mind grasped at something she hadn't noticed before.

"Professor." She whispered after a moment of silence.

"Yes?"

"You called me Hermione."


	8. Love in Latin

Severus woke up unsure of his whereabouts, _'What the hell happened last night?' _He wondered. As he slowly came to his wits, he realized the presence of another person in the room. He could feel the weight of Hermione's head lying on his chest. In all of his lifetime, he had never had a better morning than this. Here he was lying on his couch with Hermione Granger resting with him…willingly. A woman, twenty years his junior who was an ex-Hogwarts student and resident know-it-all, _willingly_ falling asleep with him. Nothing could be better, at least not to him. He did not know how long he had lain there before she began to stir.

"Hmm." She moaned in her sleepy way, "Pr-Professor?"

"Yes," He answered simply enough. He was unsure of what else to say even though his mind rushed with thoughts. _'What will she think? What will she say?'_ Severus was no stupid man. Last night he was merely doing a nice thing by calming her down, or at least that's how she would see it no doubt. He knew that there was more behind it though. If it had been anyone else, he probably would have told them to suck it up. But her, when he looked into her eyes he saw the pure despair and loneliness. How could Hermione Granger, 1/3 of the Golden Trio, be so hopeless? As he stared into the depths of her eyes, which were as unshielded as they had ever been, he caught a glimpse of something else. Just as quickly as it had been there, it was gone, but he knew what he had to do. Knew what she needed, and wanted. He let go of his inhibitions that night and he held her. He grabbed her by the elbows and pulled her towards him hastily, yet gently, and wrapped his muscular arms around her small body. Quickly, surprisingly, her tiny arms wrapped up around his neck and she clung to him tightly. He held her till she had drained herself of tears, held her as she sniffled into his shoulder. He knew now why Ron and Harry had been such great friends with her. Any man would have been lucky to be graced with her presence, but to hold her, to be held _by_ her. He wondered about Krum, and all the other men that she had dated. How could any of them have left her, but then the thought of her being with another man sickened him so much he pushed it out of his head. Now that the night was over how would she react? Would she be angry with him? He breathed in deeply and caught that faint smell again. Citrus and ginseng. He looked down only to find her staring up at him with a smile on her face. _'I guess she's not mad._' "Did you sleep well?"

"Fabulous." She answered sitting up. Her mind raced back to that time at Sirius' home when she had slept between her two best friends. Those nights were the last she had spent in peace, up until now. Reluctantly he followed suit and found there was an aching in his lower back, but the pain was quite welcome. He knew that it would merit a massage from Hermione, "You?"

"I'm afraid I can't say so for myself Miss…" He watched the smile fade from her face, and then she turned her head away from him. Why did he have to be such an asshole? He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, "Hermione, I mean. Nothing personal but I do have a pain in my back." He then moved that same hand to his back, "Otherwise it was quite…enjoyable." Her attention snapped back to him.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," he said awkwardly. He diverted his eyes a moment realizing she was still wearing his robe. She noticed as well and moved to cover herself up as much as possible.

"I-I hope I didn't startle you last night w-with my…well…tirade."

"Nonsense. Everyone has a breaking point." He said still looking away. He didn't seem able to make eye contact, "You just have a lot on your mind. It's understandable."

"When's your breaking point?" She asked staring at him. He could feel her eyes boring a hole into his head.

"I thought I used to demonstrate it everyday in class." He said. She giggled at his feeble attempt at a joke. Then there was silence, not the comfortable silence they had shared before. No, something was different now, something between them. It was awkward.

"I guess I'll go throw some clothes on," Hermione said finally breaking the quiet as she stood up and headed for Snape's bedroom, "Then maybe we can go down to breakfast. Do you think you can manage?"

"I suppose." He said not sounding all that interested.

"Do you really hate it that much?" She asked turning to face him. Finally, he looked up and caught her gaze.

"No. I…well I mean, I used to hate seeing the students." He continued determined to give an answer to her questioning glance. "They really are such an annoyance. Always cheerful, and social. It's enough to make me sick." Hermione snorted at his seriousness, and he raised an eyebrow at her reaction.

"Sorry," She replied, raising a hand up to cover her smile. She then used the very same hand to brush a loose curl behind her ear. And there it was. Those damn simple actions. If she carried on this way, she would have him groveling at her feet soon. "I almost agree with you." Again, he raised an eyebrow; she always had a way of shocking him. Because at one point she was one of those annoying students he had described, but no longer. "At least I used to think the same thing when I was a student here. I hated seeing all of my peers so joyous…because I was jealous. I knew that eventually my friends and I would face the worst kind of evil. All in the sake of mankind, which of course those students were part of. They wouldn't ever have to face the things I would. They would just continue with their simple lives." She paused here and Severus took in everything she had said, "But…I realized that I shouldn't be mad at others happiness. I should rejoice in it with them…everyone deserves to be happy."

"Very insightful Hermione."

"I guess it's pretty much the same thing with Harry. I should be happy for him. He is content and so I should be as well. There is really nothing more to it. Quite simple actually." This was a breakthrough for her. How could she have been so selfish? Harry was her friend and he, more than anyone, deserved to be happy.

"You never cease to amaze me."

"Thank You Prof…Do you still want me to call you that?"

"Call me whatever suits you." He answered, "I am no longer your teacher, so, you are no longer inclined to treat me like one."

"But I always will." She said almost in a whisper.

"Why is that?"

"Because I respect you Severus." His name flowed from her lips like honey. She smiled and finally retreated into his bedroom. When she got in there, she saw the sunlight bathing the room. She strolled on over to his window and opened it. The weather was warm, the day bright. It seemed after she had gotten back to the castle, the skies opened up and it had rained, leaving the morning sky clear and new as only the rain can do. She breathed in deeply. Her whole being was…comfortable. When was the last time she felt comfort? What was different? She knew within herself that it was him. He was certainly different. No longer the dungeon bat her friends had thought him to be, of course she could never think such a thing about anyone. She changed into her white knee length bohemian skirt Harry had brought back from Morocco for her. She then pulled on her beaded turquoise tank top. She had decided, without telling her old professor, that they were going out today. She knew he would not agree to it, but she had the perfect defense. One he could not resist. She threw on a pair of flip-flops, and the only jewelry she had on was the necklace Ron had given her on their one month anniversary back in sixth year. It was simple enough, a silver chain with a tiny crystal shaped to look like an elephant. She loved them; she had since her mother had told her about how the Chinese thought them to be good luck. She tossed her hair up into a very sloppy bun, and grabbed her purse. When she came back into the sitting room Severus was still on the couch immersed in a book. One, it seemed to Hermione, that was all in Latin.

"You know Latin then?" His head shot up and she was surprised to see him wearing glasses. "And since when do you wear those?" She asked pointing at his face. He would have answered her…if he could. He was stunned at her simplistic beauty. He merely stared at her perfect face, knowing once and for all that she did not wear make-up. She wore no jewelry except for her necklace. He couldn't remember ever seeing her without it. She needed no adornments. She was snapping in his face now, "Severus."

"Sorry," He said too loudly as he snapped out of it. "Uh…yes I do…know Latin I mean."

"Amor Vincit Omnia." Hermione said passionately. She liked him with glasses.

"How like a woman," He replied sarcastically. "Amantes sunt amentes."

"How like a man." She said just as sarcastically. With that, she grabbed the book out of his hands and tossed it on the floor.

"Hermione Granger, you are the last person on this earth that I would expect to treat a book with such disgrace."

"I'm just full of surprises." She giggled and grabbed his hands, pulling him up to his feet.

"Yes you are." He answered, "Must we really do this breakfast thing. I don't think I could face Minerva and her endless banter."

"But you can stand to listen to mine."

"You are…tolerable."

"Oh thanks!" She said smirking. "And for your information, no, we don't have to do the whole _breakfast thing_ as you call it."

"Really," He smiled widely at the thought.

"I've made other plans for us. So we better get going." She said as she started to pull him along.

"What? Where are we going?" He asked.

"We're going to have breakfast in Hogsmeade."

"Whoa-no we're not." He said tightening his resistance.

"Oh yes we are. Come on I'm sure Madame Rosmerta would love to see you."

"So."

"You are so like a child." She said joking, "And besides, you're going to want to go after you hear what I have to say."

"What's that?" He asked suspiciously. With that, she walked around him and began massaging his lower back. Right where the pain was. Instantly he was relieved, but all too soon did she remove her hands and the pain was back.

"You rub my back, I'll rub yours." She answered his questioned. "I just have a few errands to run, a few people to see, and as soon as you know it we'll be back, okay." She smiled and he couldn't resist. He knew then that as long as she smiled after anything she asked he would just have to comply.

"Fine," He answered.

"Great." She turned to walk out the door, but stopped in her tracks as if forgetting something. She turned back around quickly and looked at him. She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek grabbing his right hand as she did, "Thank you." She whispered in his ear. He thought the amount butterflies in his stomach would cause it to burst.

* * *

**Latin Phrases:**

Amor Vincit Omnia- Love conquers all

Amantes sunt amentes- Lovers are lunatics

* * *

I don't know if you have realized that I am making this whole story up as I go, and I'm trying to move along as fast as I can. Since I do a lot of drugs, I tend to forget my own stories sometimes (lol…I'm really not joking!) If you happen to find anything wrong with the chapters, such as silly little love triangles between Harry, Eva, and Ginny please let me know. I must say I was embarrassed when it was pointed out to me that there were holes in my story. Nevertheless, I guess that's why they call it _constructive_ criticism. I cannot believe I forgot my own flippin' story. Oh well, that's what I've got you guys for right? 


	9. Run in With the Enemy

She turned back around and began to pull him along and out into the corridor. They passed a few students in the hall. All of which were stunned to see the myth that was Snape, actually roaming the halls in the sunlight and with a young woman too. Naturally, rumors would abound, but he was too caught up in what had happened. Sure, she had merely kissed his cheek, but no one had ever shown him such simple kindness before, at least no one but his mother. He had not noticed until now how much Hermione reminded him of his mother. She had the same effortless beauty, the same confidence. He smiled a bit as he watched her drag him along the corridor; seemingly unaware of all the stares she was receiving. Time slowed for a moment and he took the instant to cherish all that was going on around him. The trip to Hogsmeade had been a flash yet an age at the same time.

"Okay," Hermione said pulling out a list that seemed to be an itinerary. "Do you want to eat first?" She looked up at him with a questioning glance.

"Fine." He said and she smiled. She started toward the Hogs Head and left him in her wake. He did not feel he could go on with her guidance. He felt naked when she released his hand. Now he noticed all the stares and whispers. As if she had read his mind, she turned back around and slipped her arm through his.

"Come on Severus," she whispered. He wanted to melt, but he wasn't sure why. Perhaps it was the stares, or perhaps is was the way she said his name. She led the way into the Hogs Head ignoring all the people around her. She had become increasingly better at this since she was a girl. After all, she did spend most of her time at school being picked on by…

"Malfoy." She whispered again, this time more shrilly. Her very hatred for the boy spewed from her mouth as she stared upon him. As if hearing his name being called he spun to face the couple. Hermione turned quickly trying to leave before he saw her. Unfortunately, he saw them, but it was not she that caught his eye.

"Professor Snape." Malfoy shouted across the room. Malfoy, Hermione was surprised to find, had never joined the Death Eaters. He had in fact gone to live with Dumbledore to escape the wrath of both his father and Voldemort. Needless to say, they were none too happy when he had denied the dark mark. Apparently, as a person, he had changed a lot since his youth, or so Harry had said in his letters. Because Hermione had been in France during most of the fighting, she had not witnessed Malfoy's personal growth. Even if he had changed, she did not think she would ever be able to forgive him. His constant torment of her had done more damage then she had allowed visible. "Professor Snape," he said again grabbing Severus by his arm, still not noticing Hermione. She attempted to hide her face.

"Draco, dear boy." Severus said making an effort at a fatherly tone. "Fancy meeting you here."

"And you sir." Draco replied patting his professor on the back, "What's it been three-four months. You look a lot healthier." At least he sounded nice, Hermione thought, but that's how he'd always been with Severus. "And who's this here?" _'No, no, no, NO!'_ Hermione's mind screamed at Severus. She wanted to leave…now. Draco stepped in front of her and extended his hand, "I'm Draco Malfoy. And you are?" He had to be joking. She hadn't changed _that_ much. Maybe it was her silence or perhaps the look on her face that got Severus' attention, but he jumped in for her quickly.

"Draco, don't be silly of course you remember your old classmate." Draco looked back and forth between Hermione and Severus. He hadn't really listened to the professor's words. He had gone to school with plenty of people, but certainly not this girl. He would have remembered such a pretty face. He had matured greatly since his school days, no longer looking for the flashy kind of girl. Quickly an image of Pansy Parkinson flashed into his mind and he shook it away. He liked how natural this girl was. "Draco," Severus said getting his attention, "This is Hermione Granger." His shock must have been obvious on his features. He found himself to be perpetually dumbfounded. Honestly, he had not thought about her since she had left for France. They had still been quarreling then, but he doubted he could ever bring himself to call her those things again.

"W-well, Hermione." She took his hand into hers and shook it quickly, trying desperately to not make eye contact. It was not until this point that she realized she was clutching tightly at Severus' arm. She loosened her grip, just a bit, but the need for stability didn't go unnoticed. Wait did Malfoy just call her…Hermione? "When did you come back?"

"A few weeks ago," She answered warily, finally looking at him. "I came back to take care of Severus."

"Severus? Really?" he said looking between the two, "May I ask why."

"Perhaps you should ask him yourself." She knew she must remain civil, but every bone ached with the want to hex him into oblivion.

"Well maybe we can talk about it over breakfast together." He said now staring directly at Hermione. She couldn't remember a time when he had looked at her like…like a human being. Still she was not comfortable with being around him, she had thought him out of her life forever. Severus seemed, somehow, to read her mind and answered for her.

"I'm sorry Draco," he said lazily, "But already this conversation has taken up too much time. Hermione and I have errands to run, and very limited time to get them done." With this, he looked at her and she saw him faintly smile which she returned graciously. The reaction of the two did not go unobserved by Draco. He found it odd that these two would be acting so…civil toward one another. Was it really civility he was seeing or something more? "Maybe another time."

"Quite alright Professor." He answered, "I'm sure I will being seeing you two around soon anyway. We have much time to catch up."

"Why?" Hermione couldn't stop herself from asking.

"Oh…I'm going to be working at Hogwarts from now until the end of term." He answered smiling, obviously proud. "Maybe you didn't know but it seems the present DADA teacher is expecting." Severus raised an eyebrow at this.

"Really?" He asked in false curiosity.

"Oh yes. So until she is ready to come back I will be taking her class."

"Well I guess there is no one better to teach the dark arts than you." It was a low blow, she knew, but it didn't really matter. The comment went completely over his head.

"No I guess not," He replied smiling. Hermione faked a smiled back and let loose a little giggle. Severus wished to laugh as well, but held his composure. Unfortunately, Draco misinterpreted her implication and instead took as attraction. All women wanted Draco Malfoy and Hermione was no different. God how arrogant he was.

"So we'll being seeing you soon Mr. Malfoy," Severus said as he led Hermione to the door. Draco courteously opened it for the two.

"I hope so." He answered almost in a whisper. It was obvious that the statement was directed at her. She was not used to the attention of men and so his hint went unnoticed, at least by her. Draco stared down at her as she brushed by him out the door. Severus glared at him and followed her out the door. Draco stared after her for a while before being called back inside by his friends. This was going to be a challenge, but a pleasant one.


	10. Visiting Old Friends

The two walked in silence for a while, looking from store to store, until Hermione finally spoke up.

"Thank you," she said in a whisper as she looked through a store window.

"For what," She turned and faced him head on.

"you know exactly what I'm talking about." She said, "Don't make me say it."

"What Draco?"

"Of course Draco, seeing him today it…it just, wasn't comfortable for me," She started walking again, slowly, and he followed suit.

"Did he really bother you that much at school."

"Of course he did," She said turning on him, "He was terrible to me."

"I-I'm sorry," And she found it almost impossible to be mad at him. One look into his eyes and she knew his apology was real.

"It's not your fault, its just Draco, he gets me so angry."

"Well I'm glad _I_ don't make you this mad." He said, "I have to live with you." His jokes were so stupid, not even jokes really, but he had a way of making her laugh almost like Ron used to do. She smiled up at him.

"Oh shut it." She replied, "Oh here it is," apparently they had almost passed the store she was looking for. Severus looked up before he walked in and it took him only a second to realize where they were. Of course it was a new shop, but the three interlocked W's gave it away.

"Oh no," he said stepping away from the door, "Uh-uh it took me seven years to get rid of them. There's no way you're going to get me in there." She was surprised, he could see it on her face.

"Uh…are you sure. I'm only going to run in for a second."

"You mean you're not going to force me to go in there with you?"

"Well no of course not. Not after what you did for me back at the Hogs Head, dispatching Malfoy so effortlessly." She replied, "It wouldn't hurt if you went in with me though." Maybe it was the way her lip curved into a pout as she said it, or perhaps it was the way the sun shone on her olive skin. Either way he knew then he could not deny her anything. She was up on the second step giving her some height, but even with the higher ground she was still only eye level with him. Her skirt was flowing around her, and her brown eyes were bright with enthusiasm as they always were.

"Fine." He said trying to hide all the passion that was bubbling inside him. "This is going to be quick right?" He asked as he placed a foot on the first step.

"I promise," She whispered blowing hot breath on his face, which was now dangerously close to hers. She turned and opened the door for him, then she gestured for him to go in first. He did and she followed right behind. Bells jingled as they stepped in and a voice from the back shouted. The words were muffled and indistinguishable. Severus looked to Hermione and she merely shrugged, then continued on toward the middle of the shop. It was much bigger than it looked on the outside. And the items it held seemed like everyday kind of things, though Severus sensed that they were not. He began looking on all of the shelves and found that most of the things were unmarked.

"Her…"

"_Hermione!_" He heard a voice shout. He watched as Hermione turned and ran over to a man he had never wished to see again.

"Fred!" She said cheerily, "Where's Geor…"

"_Hermione!"_

"Never mind." She managed to giggle out.

"Where the hell have you been kid." Fred asked as Hermione was scooped up into the arms of George Weasley. He spun her around in a circle and placed her back down gently. Severus felt a twinge of jealousy in the pit of his stomach. Oh how he wanted to do the same thing, he wanted so much to pick her up and hold her. He wanted her to be his.

"You know I was in France." She answered after getting her bearings and brushing herself off. Fred smacked himself on the forehead, quickly followed by George smacking him in the back of the head.

"Oh that's right…Ow."

"When did you get back," George asked ignoring his brother.

"A few weeks ago. I've been catching up with everyone so I knew I just had to come here and find out how everything is."

"It's great," Fred said, "Business is booming. I don't know how we'll ever pay Harry back for what he's done."

"That's wonderful! How's the family?"

"All is well. Dad just got promoted actually." Fred answered.

"Yeah apparently he made a huge breakthrough. He's been introducing magic family's to some muggle contraption. Surprisingly it's had a great response."

George said jumping in on the conversation.

"Really what is it?"

"The Fellytone."

"The wha…oh, yes I know of it." She said smiling, "And it's quite popular?"

"Oh yes wizarding family's all over are beginning to use them. Turns out Dad was right," Fred said. "Some muggle things are very useful."

"Yeah, especially now when most magical people are mixed," George replied, "It's a good way to bring people together."

"Well you two sound like you've really grown up," Severus couldn't help but snort at her comment. The Weasley's? Mature? Unfortunately his reaction brought their attention to him, a very unwanted attention.

"Professor Snape?" The boys said in unison.

"We thought you were dead," George said right before receiving a tap on the back of the head from Hermione.

"Never one for reserve." She said and Severus smirked.

"Uh…can we help you sir?" Fred asked obviously confused, surely Snape was not in there to buy something. He was much too serious for that.

"Oh no I'm just waiting for Hermione here." And the attention was back on Hermione. She merely smiled at them.

"What?" She asked. She knew exactly what, she was daring them to ask.

"Wh-when did you two become friends?"

"As you know I am a healer," The redheads nodded listening intently, "That's why I'm back. My job has brought me here. To the aid of an old friend and professor." Fred raised an eyebrow, and George still looked befuddled. She looked at Severus and she saw how uncomfortable he was, no matter how hard he tried to hide it. "I'm sorry boys. I know I just got here but we must be leaving now."

"Huh…oh yeah. Of course Hermione." Fred said leaning forward to give her a hug. "Listen," he whispered, "Don't be afraid to visit you hear." He kissed her on the top of the head, "We've missed you kid." With that he pinched her cheeked and tossed her off to George who, once again scooped her up into a bear hug. Her feet were dangling in the air, and she could barely breathe. After he had also kissed her head they sent her off, but only when she had promised to visit again. Hermione could remember only one time before when they had acted so brotherly towards her.

_When she had flown in from France for Ron's funeral they were the one's who picked her up. She had been surprised because they had actually brought their dad's old flying car. That day there would be no flying. Only tears and sadness. Never before had she seen Fred and George so solemn. While Fred drove, George and herself had sat in the back. All had been silent in the car, almost unbearably silent. The lack of communication was what drove Hermione to tears. If they would just say something she would be okay. If they would just make a joke, act like themselves it would all be okay. If Fred and George, the two boys that she had never seen morose, couldn't be alright then the world would never be the same. They had been the last straw for her. Silently she broke down and the tears streamed from her eyes. They did not go unnoticed and quickly, too quickly Fred pulled the car over. Almost instantly she was in a cocoon between the two. They rocked her until she was drained of all sadness. No one had said a word, but no one needed to. She knew they had a right to be as sad as she was. She knew that they would be okay. That soon enough they would be the same. She regretted that she had never been close with the twins, but it was never too late. _

Severus had to admit that he was surprised about how the twins had acted with Hermione. Just as the Potter boy had. Just as Ron had when they were at school. He knew why, any man who was lucky enough to know her should certainly know to protect her. She was a treasure, she was precious, yet independent. She had shown that when she went off to France all on her own. She would never be owned.

"Maybe we should go back to the school to get some lunch." Severus said surprising Hermione.

"Really," She asked, "You feel up to it?"

"I think I'll manage." Of course he would manage how could he ever be embarrassed when he had her by his side. The stares and taunts would never even register with him if she was there.


	11. Love Letters, and Broken Hearts

Severus hadn't realized just how hungry he actually was, at least not until he heard his stomach exert a tremendous growl. Hermione looked at him as she giggled.

"Hungry?" She asked as they finally reached the front door of the school.

"I think so." He answered holding the door open for, "What about you? You must be starving."

"Oh, not really actually. Just a little lunch will be good for me."

"How is that possible?"

"I guess I just got used to French eating habits." She answered, he noticed that she used her hands to express herself, "Besides, I've never really been a big eater."

"Huh. Well I bet I could eat enough for the both of us."

"That's good. You need to eat, you have been looking a little scrawny," she joked.

"Ha me, and what about you. A little puff of wind would blow you away."

"Oh I doubt that."

They turned into the Great Hall and this time Severus did not notice the stares. Even the ones they received from the teachers. They sat next to one another at the teacher's table and Severus had himself a very big lunch. Hermione picked at a few things before they both decided they were successfully filled. They departed the hall and starting walking back to his rooms, and for some reason it got quiet. It seemed like there was nothing else to talk about. He chanced a glance at her as they started walking down the stairs. A long curling strand had managed to get itself out of her bun and she tucked it back into place behind her ear. He breathed in deeply when she did and she noticed.

"Are you alright Severus?" She asked.

"Yes, yes I'm fine."

"Hm," she replied, "Well that may be, but when we get back to room I think you should rest. I hope I didn't push you too much today."

"Actually I think today had a great affect on me." He answered, "I've been feeling much better since…" He stopped himself he couldn't…wouldn't say what he wanted too. It was she that made him feel better, healthier. When she realized he was not going to continue she started talking.

"All the same, I think I remember you telling me something about a pain in your back." She looked up at him with a questioning glance. He nodded and turned the corner and down the corridor that led to his rooms. He spoke the password and the door made a small creak as it unlocked. He pushed it open and gestured for her to go first. She floated passed him into the room and he once again resisted the urge to touch her.

"What a day." He said as he closed the door behind himself.

"Was it really that bad?" She asked feigning disappointment.

"It was bearable."

"Bearable." She said putting her hands on her hips, "Really. Well my presence must really be a bore then huh?"

"No." He said bluntly and she raised an eyebrow in question. He didn't need to say much, just a name and she would understand, "Malfoy." She released a sigh as she sat down on the couch.

"Yes I know what you mean. I could have led a happy life if I never had to see him again."

"I would never believe that you could loathe someone so much Hermione."

"See the reason that I've never hated anyone else is because I direct all…_all_." She made it a point to emphasize this word, "of my hatred towards him." Severus laughed at this. "Don't laugh at me." She said as she threw a couch pillow at him.

"I think I'm beginning to understand you."

"Well I'm not really a hard person to understand."

"Oh trust me you are. More than you know."

"What does that mean."

"It means, Hermione, that you have more depth than you allow yourself to believe." He said smirking.

"Oh rubbish. I'm as simple as they come."

"Okay, okay let's not get into a fight over it." He said but she, all of a sudden, seemed distracted by something.

"Do you hear that," she whispered. He allowed his ears to adjust and after a while heard a small tapping noise.

"What the hell is that?" He said almost to himself because Hermione was already busy searching for the source of the noise. He watched her go into his bedroom, and after a moment followed her. He found her there sitting on his bed with a note in her hand, and when he saw the owl he understood.

"Someone has sent you a post then?" He asked.

"Y-yes, but it doesn't say from who." She answered.

"Is it from Harry?" She shook her head.

"No if Harry had to ask me something he could just call. Besides the note…it just couldn't be from him." She said still looking at the letter.

"Why? What does it say?" Severus asked as he reached for it. She handed it over reluctantly and watched as he read it. It was written in big loopy letters, and it read:

_Hermione,_

_Long have I seen you and still never have I known you. I wish to do so. Please meet me in the gardens tonight at 12:00. I will be waiting. If you do not show I will leave you alone forever. _

_Love always..._

"Severus, do you have any idea who wrote this?"

"N-no." he said calmly, " It could be anyone."

"Hm." She seemed perplexed. Never had he ever seen Hermione Granger, incessant know-it-all, perplexed. At this he smiled. "What?" She asked returning the look, "Do you know something. I swear Severus if I find out you had som…"

"No, no it's not that," he said laughing, "I just cannot believe I am witnessing the one and only time that Hermione Granger is stumped." She pushed him playfully.

"Oh stuff it you." This just made him laugh more.

"Well I guess we'll just have to start your therapy right away then."

"Why's that?" He asked the laughter now fading.

"Well I don't want to be late for my date." Severus wondered if she could hear his heart drop into the pit of his stomach. He was almost positive it had made a loud splash.

"Y-you mean you're actually goin?"

"Of course I'm going. Wouldn't you?" She said, "If I don't go then I will wonder for the rest of my life who it was. He could be the man of my dreams for all I know." She had to have heard it that time. The sound his heart made as it broke was deafening.

"But it could be anyone. He could be a death eater for all you know."

"Look Severus, I'm flattered that you're concerned, but I can take care of myself." She said taking his hands into hers, "So don't worry I'll be fine." She really was the dumbest smart person he had ever met. Here he was trying to express how he felt, and failing miserably, but still if anyone could understand him it would be her. But he had no such luck. "Now come we'll get the massage started right away."

* * *

I know, I know when it comes to French eating habits they usually have big lunches, but I needed an excuse. For what, you ask. Hmm… 

"**Mad World"**

All around me are familiar faces  
Worn out places, worn out faces  
Bright and early for their daily races  
Going nowhere, going nowhere

Their tears are filling up their glasses  
No expression, no expression  
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow  
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kinda funny  
I find it kinda sad  
The dreams in which I'm dying  
Are the best I've ever had  
I find it hard to tell you  
I find it hard to take  
When people run in circles  
It's a very, very mad world mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good  
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday  
Made to feel the way that every child should  
Sit and listen, sit and listen  
Went to school and I was very nervous  
No one knew me, no one knew me  
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson  
Look right through me, look right through me

And I find it kinda funny  
I find it kinda sad  
The dreams in which I'm dying  
Are the best I've ever had  
I find it hard to tell you  
I find it hard to take  
When people run in circles  
It's a very, very mad world...world  
Enlarge your world  
Mad world


	12. First Day of My Life

I have an excuse for not updating. Oh and it's a good one too, This song should pretty much sum it up:

"**Rainy Day Woman"**

They'll stone ya when you're tryin' to be so good,  
They'll stone ya just like they said they would,  
They'll stone ya when you're tryin' to go home,  
They'll stone ya when you're there all alone,  
But I would not feel so all alone.  
**Everybody must get stoned.**

**

* * *

As Severus sat on the edge of the couch only one thing ran through his mind. He was going to kill whoever sent that letter. He managed to make it through the massage without turning around and strangling Hermione. How could she be so blind. Didn't she realize that he was being nice to her, _nice_. Didn't she see why. He could no longer deny his feelings for her, and he knew the root of his anger stemmed from his jealousy. If only it had been him who had sent the note. But no, he could never have enough nerve to go through with it. He now found himself staring into the fire and thinking of ways to seriously, _seriously_ hurt someone. He waited for Hermione as patiently as he could. As soon as she was done changing he was going to give her a piece of his mind. He would tell her about his feelings for her. But what did he feel for her. Was it _love_? How would he ever know, that term was all too foreign to him. After about twenty minutes he stood up and began to pace, he had to admit that woman worked wonders. There was no longer any pain or tension in his back and he found it much easier to move, he shook the thought away and wondered what the hell was taking so long. How long could it possibly take for her to get ready? As he paced back and forth over and over his mind drifted from thought to thought and perhaps for the second time in his life, Severus became unaware of his surroundings. He didn't notice when his bedroom door opened and Hermione stepped out into the sitting room.**As Severus sat on the edge of the couch only one thing ran through his mind. He was going to kill whoever sent that letter. He managed to make it through the massage without turning around and strangling Hermione. How could she be so blind. Didn't she realize that he was being nice to her, . Didn't she see why. He could no longer deny his feelings for her, and he knew the root of his anger stemmed from his jealousy. If only it had been him who had sent the note. But no, he could never have enough nerve to go through with it. He now found himself staring into the fire and thinking of ways to seriously, hurt someone. He waited for Hermione as patiently as he could. As soon as she was done changing he was going to give her a piece of his mind. He would tell her about his feelings for her. But what did he feel for her. Was it ? How would he ever know, that term was all too foreign to him. After about twenty minutes he stood up and began to pace, he had to admit that woman worked wonders. There was no longer any pain or tension in his back and he found it much easier to move, he shook the thought away and wondered what the hell was taking so long. How long could it possibly take for her to get ready? As he paced back and forth over and over his mind drifted from thought to thought and perhaps for the second time in his life, Severus became unaware of his surroundings. He didn't notice when his bedroom door opened and Hermione stepped out into the sitting room. 

"Trying to wear a hole in the floor Severus?" She asked after watching him for a moment. He seemed bathed in the firelight, and his profile was outlined by it. His features were not as bad as they had once seemed to her. Perhaps it was that scowl that, as a teen, she had seen permanently plastered to his face. Now he was kind and nice. He no longer seemed like the cruel and callous man he had once displayed, and that softened his appearance a great deal. She had to admit to herself that she was growing fond of him, and greatly enjoyed his presence. He jumped a bit at the sound of her voice and she put a hand up to her mouth to cover her giggle. "Bit jumpy there huh?"

"Uh…yes." This was it, he was going to tear her apart, "Hermione, I thin-" Something stopped him, but it was not fear. He tried to keep his eyes off her as he spoke, but his attempt failed. He knew if he could just stop looking at her for a moment he could get his words out. That way he wouldn't have to see the hurt on her face. Once he had looked into her brown eyes all the thoughts in his head disappeared.

"Se-Severus are you alright?" She asked concerned, "Do you need to sit down?"

"No, no girl I'm alright." _Wow_ he thought. She looked stunning. She had changed out of the clothes from earlier and into a different dress. The simplicity of the dress had almost brought Severus to his knees. "Hermione, you look a-amazing."

"Hm…oh, oh thank you Severus. You really think so?" She asked as she twirled in a circle. The black dress fanned out with the air, and Severus caught his breath. The strappy dress scooped down into a low v-neck that showed off her fabulous décolletage, and just a bit of cleavage. There was a sash that came together in the front that tied into a small bow right at the middle, and the bottom was angled just a little to the left. She topped it all off with the necklace from Ron and a charm bracelet. She carried a small black purse and wore silver, rhinestone studded heels. Her hair was once again up, but this time, it seemed, she had taken a little more care at pinning it that way. Severus enjoyed seeing her in his favorite color, he only wished it had been for him. "I had Ginny floo it over. I didn't think to bring anything like this with me."

"I really don't know about this Herm-," He started, but she was ready for him. She walked over to him in front of the fireplace.

"Severus," She interrupted, "I know what you're going to say, and I am truly grateful for your concern, but I can take care of myself. Don't worry about me." With that she once again took his hands into hers and she leaned in to kiss him on the cheek. "I'll be back soon. Don't wait up." She whispered in his ear. As she pulled away Severus felt a strong sense of longing, and he wondered when and if that void would ever be filled again. Hermione reached for the door handle, she looked back, smiled and waved goodbye. As she stood outside of his room she leaned against the wall. For the second time today she had kissed him, she hadn't meant to, it just happened. What was she thinking? Why did she do it? Was it really flattery that led her to give him the kiss, or something more. She had always been like this. Ask her a question about arithmancy and she'll give you an answer, but ask her a question about her feelings and she'll be dumbstruck. She rolled her eyes as she pushed herself away from the wall, and as she began the long walk to the gardens she wondered if, when she kissed his cheek, Severus had felt that tiny shiver run down her back.

Five minutes later Hermione found herself standing in the gardens. They weren't far from the castle, but they weren't close either. Event though it seemed absurd, Severus' notions that the letter was foul play, involuntarily played through her mind, and as she stood there alone she wondered if anyone would be able to hear her. _'You're going mad.' _She told herself. Why would anyone go through the trouble of capturing, or harming her this late in the game. A slight breeze ran through the night sky, and Hermione shivered a bit from the cold. Winter was coming, slowly but surely, and she welcomed it. She had always been quite fond of the cooler weather.

"A bit cold out here isn't it?" A voice asked from behind her, and it sounded all too familiar. She turned, slowly, to find Draco Malfoy standing four feet away from her, and another shiver ran through her body. This time it was not from the cold. She could barely see him in the dark, but she knew it was him none the less.

"Dr-Draco what are you doing out here." She didn't want him to answer, she already knew the answer and it gave her a dreadful feeling in her stomach. _'Please God, do not let it be him. Do not let it be him.'_

"The same thing you're doing out here." _'No.' _she thought, _'Oh no.'_ "Please, Hermione, don't look so shocked."

"It-it's just…I-I…You?"

"Yes, it was I who sent the letter," He answered with his usual drawl that had become familiar with.

"But Draco…I thought…" She stuttered out. What the hell was going on with the world.

"That I hated you."

"Well…yeah."

"I never hated you Hermione. I may have been afraid of you, but never did I hate you."

"Afraid of me, but why?" She was perplexed.

"Any man we be a fool not to be fearful of you. You're intelligence is a scare all in itself." He answered nonchalantly, "I, especially, was terrified that one day my constant torment of you would earn me a good hex. And if my memory is correct I think it did once or twice."

"Well then why did you torment me," Her defense was slowly decreasing, but she still had her arms wrapped around herself, almost like a personal barrier.

"If I hadn't acted the way I did, you don't think Crabbe and Goyle wouldn't have run off and told my father immediately. Or any other of his lackeys for that matter." He answered, "I only did it to protect myself…I-I'm sorry." She was gaping, but she did nothing to hide her shock. Draco Malfoy had just apologized for, what was probably, the first time in his life. "Again Hermione, don't look so shocked. You're hurting my feelings," He said jokingly.

"I- I'm amazed. I mean…you…wow!"

"Ha I know, I'm not actually the unbearable prick you thought I was. I just thought you should know."

"Well, apology accepted." She said. She couldn't think of anything else to say, but she no longer felt distrustful.

"It's good to see you Hermione." She found herself, once again, floored. This time she held back her reaction, but couldn't help smiling. She stared awkwardly at her feet.

"You too Draco, well it is now anyway. A few moments ago I was about ready to curse you and run." He laughed at her comment.

"Well I'm glad you didn't." She gave a short discomfited laugh and he stepped closer to her. Her defenses flew back up again. She could now see his face clearly and she could tell something was wrong. She wasn't sure what it was, but one look and she knew not to trust him. Still he walked closer. A stray hair blew across her face, knocked out of her bun by the wind. She was still staring intently at the ground as he came ever closer. He reached out his hand and tucked the tendril behind her ear. Her body tensed at his touch and she had an odd feeling, like she would wretch at any moment. She pulled back a little, but Draco hardly seemed to notice. "It's _really_ good to see you." He drawled out. Her mind was screaming now, '_run, run.'_

"Draco," She whispered right before he grabbed her shoulders and pulled her towards him. His lips collided with hers in a searing kiss. It was not gentle or sweet as it had been with Ron, or even Viktor. The kissed seemed to burn her and she wrenched herself from his arms.

"Just what the hell do you think you're doing," she yelled as she tried to compose herself.

"Don't you want me Hermione?" He asked trying to seduce her. _'Is he joking?'_ She thought. He sounded like such an idiot.

"What?" She screamed, "Of course not, and don't even pretend that I acted as if I did. How could I have been so dumb. You could never change."

"Please Hermione don't fool yourself. Of course you want me, everyone does." He said as he tried to reach for her again. Again she backed away and tears began to well up in his eyes.

"You are still the same arrogant little ferret that you always were. And don't you dare tell me what I want. You don't know me, and you have no one to blame but yourself for that."

"God, what the hell was I thinking coming out here tonight. You're just as _you_ always were. A filthy little mudblood." Draco winced as Hermione's hand came in contact with his face. Quickly a florid red marking came to show on his pale skin. He touched his hand to where she had slapped him and looked at her with contempt. "How dare you touch me."

"If I remember correctly _you_ were the one who touched me first." He seemed to have had enough after that comment because he raised his hand to strike her. With her quick reflexes she threw her hands up and blocked his hit. Then without a second to think she kicked him with force. As Draco collapse to the ground clutching at his manhood, Hermione began booking up the hill towards Hogwarts. Her hair was haphazardly flying around her, and a million thoughts racked her brain. She felt so stupid allowing him to flatter her like that, and actually believing him. She knew she had a good judge of character, and it took one look into his eyes to see he was a fake. She thought about how horrible her life had been up until that point, and knew that this was just the cherry on top of a great year. _'Well when it rains it pours.' _As if on cue the skies opened up and the rain poured down. By the time she reached the castle she was soaked through and her hair had almost completely fallen out of place. She slowed her pace as she trudged down the corridors, checking behind her every so often to make sure Malfoy wasn't following.

She reached the door to Snape's rooms and stood there for awhile. How could she explain this to him? How would he react? Finally, when she had built up her confidence, she thought there is only one way to find out. She spoke the password, and stepped inside, feet making a squish sound as she did. She tossed her shoes and her soaked purse in front of the fire and stood in place. She knew Severus was coming, she didn't know how she knew. She just did. She found herself to be right as Severus walked out of his bedroom. He stared at her in shock.

"You were right." She whispered. She had her arms wrapped around her body once again, but this time for warmth.

"Hermione," he said almost inaudibly, nevertheless she heard him and could not help but feel ashamed. She wondered how she must look. He had been the one to tell her not to go, and she had argued. She again told herself how dumb she had been. Severus grabbed the blanket off the back off the couch and walked over to her in three huge strides. "What happened?" He asked. Hermione only stood there and stared into the flames, obviously lost in thought. "Hermione," he whispered taking her chin in his hand and turning her gaze to him. "What happened?"

"Draco."

"WHAT?" He yelled and Hermione jumped at the huge increase of his voice. He began pacing, "What did he do to you? Did he hurt you? I must alert the Headmaster immediately."

"Severus."

"He will be sacked for this, I'll make sure of it."

"Severus."

"What," He asked a bit too coldly. This time she didn't jump.

"He didn't hurt me. Although he did try to hit me," seeing the look on his face she quickly spoke again, "But I blocked it and then…" She looked back into the fire.

"Then?" He prompted her.

"Then I kicked him." Slowly a small grin crept onto his face.

"You kicked him?" She couldn't help but smile herself.

"Yes." As if he couldn't hold it in any longer he began laughing uncontrollably.

"Stop laughing at me." She said still smiling.

"I'm sorry, but that is hilarious. You mean to tell me you subdued Malfoy by kicking him."

"well it's really a matter of _where_ I kicked him." Again he laughed. As he controlled himself he stared at her with a kind yet scrutinizing look.

"I told you so."

"Oh shut up." She said grinning. Normally she would have given him a playful punch along with her sarcasm, but her heart just wasn't in it. Neither was her mind really. It seemed her thoughts would drift from what happened a few moments before, and what was going on now. Again she faced the fire finding herself unable to look Severus in the eye. She was so cold and her body trembled, but it may have been fear that sent those chills down her back. She would be seeing Malfoy soon, whether she wanted to or not. Hermione was awoken from her stupor by the feel of a hand on the small of her back.

"Here," Severus said, "Move closer to the fire. You need to warm up or you'll catch a cold." He pushed her closer and she lowered herself onto the floor. The oriental carpet cushioned her bottom, and she felt comfortable. She tightened the blanket around her shoulders and stared intently at the fire willing it to warm her.

"God, what an asshole." She said absentmindedly.

"W-what?" Severus asked as he too lowered himself to the floor, "I hope you're not talking about me."

"Of course not." She answered briefly making eye contact.

"Any man who raises a hand to a woman is an asshole." He said back to her, his face a pallet of complete seriousness. "Hermione I know that you would not wish me to do it, but if I see him…I-I will make him pay." He was a bit shocked when he saw her smile at him.

"Well you're right, I don't agree with that, but I commend you for your offer." She answered. They sat together in silence a while longer. Severus had called up a house elf and Hermione now had a cup of chamomile tea in front of her. He had offered it, and she had accepted all in complete silence, but still she was comfortable. _Comfortable_, how often that word seemed to be coming to mind lately. Comfort had seemed a luxury long lost, at least before something changed. She wasn't stupid by any means, and she knew that the deciding factor had been Severus. Him and nothing else. She had finally given up on trying to deny it, what was the point. You can't lie to yourself, because you'll always know. She looked over to her old potions professor and noticed that, he too, had found himself lost in thought. She slowly stretched a hand across to him and placed it gently on his forearm. "Severus," he quickly turned his head towards her and locked gaze. "Thank you, and I'm sorry."

"W-what? For what?"

"First of all, thank you for trying to help me." She said, she meant to continue but got cut off.

"My, my aren't you arrogant. What makes you think I'm trying to help you." Hermione merely raised an eyebrow in response.

"And second of all," Hermione continued ignoring his comment, "I'm sorry for being so stupid. You tried to tell me…" Once again she was cut off, but this time by Severus' hand.

"You _are not_ stupid." He whispered.

"I was stupid enough not to see Malfoy for what he was."

"But you did. In Hogsmeade today, I could have sworn you were holding on to me for dear life. I think I just may have a bruise from where you squeezed me." He answered now rubbing the spot where she had clutched at his arm, "Who knew I tiny girl like you was so strong? You knew he was bad news right away. Whether you realized it or not doesn't matter. Subconsciously you knew, and immediately you threw up your defenses. Do not doubt yourself like that Hermione. Trust me if you do, in time it will begin to wear you down." Hermione did not miss the undertone in his comment, but she kept it to herself. Something about the way he said it, she knew he wasn't ready to talk about it. "Hermione?"

"Hm?"

"How did it come to happen? Did he just come up and try to hit you?"

"No…No actually we had a civil conversation beforehand." She answered. She took a sip of her tea and continued, "He was standing in the dark for the most part, but I knew it was him all the same. It wasn't until I could see his face clearly…There was something about his face that was…wrong." She continued with the rest of the story and told him about the kiss. When she finished she found that she felt immensely better.

"Hm." Severus said as he thought over her words, "I'd say you do have a good judge of character Hermione."

"With Malfoy it's easy."

"I'm surprised you didn't fall for his charm and good looks." He said, but Hermione wasn't sure if he was serious or not. She stared into the fire and took another sip of tea. She turned her head and caught his gaze before answering.

"Some people are like crystal, Severus, nice to look at, but you can see right through them." She paused a moment, still capturing his gaze, "Others though, are a little more difficult to interpret."

"Are you insinuating something _Miss Granger_."

"Nothing _sir_. Nothing at all." (**A/n: I plead the fif! Lol, anyone who watches Chapelle's show will understand.**)

* * *

Let me just say this, last night I sincerely wished to update, but certain _natural_ occurrences…well occurred. You see these past ten days have been my spring break, and you would think that during that time I would get a lot of writing done. Yeah well so did I. Picture this: last day of school before break. Me in my ugly ass brown school jumper, pink SH emblem stuck onto my left boob, brown stockings, brown shoes, and my yellow blouse. I know what you're thinking 'wow stylish.' And in my head I'm thinking (you know besides worrying about the fact that I look like a big pile of walking poo) 'Yes spring break. Can't wait to get home and do some writing.' Well as you know I also have a life. Something I have quite forgotten about for a while. Anyway it sure did catch up with me……WooHoo did it catch up with me. You should be extremely, _extremely_ happy that I did not update. For if I had it would most likely have been some drunken nonsense. I doubt I was straight for more than three hours in the past ten days. I think this writing is the only thing that keeps me from going into alcoholics anonymous…okay so I'm not that bad, don't look down on me for it either. I just like to have fun, lots of it. I still go to school, get good grades, and manage to do everything else. Now allow me to blog for a moment: Last night, family party for my aunt Jessie who, guess what, is younger than me (?) anyway there's me bored out of my skull, oh and what's this that catches my ear. Jessie's older cousin talking about a certain smoking utensil. Imagine that! So I innocently scoot over to where this intelligent young man is sitting and I work my charm on him. By 10:30PM I was blazed out of my effing mind in the back of his extremely dirty car. So about 20 minutes later I peace out and I'm driving in the car with my step-mom. Mind you we were in some backwoods gun club in New Jersey so it's a pretty long drive. I'm listening to the perfect stoner song, 'Rainy Day Woman,' by Bob Dylan and then it hit me. Bam! Motion sickness, Bridget (my step-mom) had to stop four times. EW! I felt soooo bad for her, but at least she knew I was, umm incapacitated by a certain,_ natural,_ "drug". So there you have it, my excuse for why I have not updated (if you really care). I love ya'll madly. Please R&R!

* * *

**"First Day Of My Life" **Bright Eyes

This is the first day of my life  
I swear I was born right in the doorway  
I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed  
Their spreading blankets on the beach

Yours is the first face that I saw  
I think I was blind before I met you  
Now I don't know where I am  
I don't know where I've been  
But I know where I want to go

And so I thought I'd let you know  
That these things take forever  
I especially am slow  
But I realize that I need you  
And I wondered if I could come home

Remember the time you drove all night  
Just to meet me in the morning  
And I thought it was strange you said everything changed  
You felt as if you had just woke up  
And you said "this is the first day of my life  
I'm glad I didn't die before I met you  
But now I don't care I could go anywhere with you  
And I'd probably be happy"

So if you want to be with me  
With these things there's no telling  
We just have to wait and see  
But I'd rather be working for a paycheck  
Then waiting to win the lottery  
Besides maybe this time is different  
I mean I really think you like me


	13. Here With Me

They sat there like that for a while. Neither saying a word. Sometimes one would lift their cup of tea and take a sip. Hermione was beginning to feel warm again, and she shrugged the blanket down lower on her arms. She didn't want to imagine how she looked. She was sure her outer-self mirrored her inner-feelings, _dreadful_. Her mind sighed and, as if on cue, lethargy took over her body. She was glad she was seated, because she knew that if she hadn't been, she probably would have collapsed. She faced her ex-potions master, ready to excuse herself to bed. He was staring intently into the fire with a frown on his face. She sighed again, but this time out loud. His head snapped up and he looked into her eyes. She couldn't read his face which was completely placid-looking.

"What," he asked with no emotion. A line of an old poem ran through his mind quickly, and was gone. _When thou sigh'st, thou sigh'st not wind,  
but sigh'st my soul away…_

"There was something my mother used to tell me you know." She stated as a dreamy look came over her features. She remained quiet, and Severus got tired of waiting for her to continue.

"Yes." He said, still no emotion seeping through his words. He was trying hard to keep them bottled up. Seeing her bathed in the firelight was enough to make him come undone. Seeing her shoulders peeking out from under the blanket was driving him mad with temptation. He must, _must_, practice some reserve. If he didn't he knew he would end up doing something completely out-of-character. Not that he hadn't already, but the thoughts running through his head…he could never act on them.

"Well, she told me never to frown, even when you're sad" She said. Now her face glowed as if she had been victorious somehow.

"And why is that?" He asked her, knowing full well her statement was directed at him, or his actions rather.

"Because you never know who is falling in love with your smile." What he felt then could be summed up in one word, _stunned_. As she stared at him, the only face he could make was one of utter bewilderment. It happened then, as he gaped at her, just as if a light bulb had gone off in his head, he knew. He was in love with her. He felt a pang in his heart. Nothing Voldemort had ever done to him had caused as much pain as he felt then. He suddenly missed her and he, just as every one does, knew why. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them. He couldn't let down his guard, he just couldn't, and it pained him more. Quickly he contained himself again and he spoke.

"I don't think that I'll ever have to worry about that Hermione." He said, "I know nothing of love. It seems almost to be a mirage, or a façade.

"How could you say that. Isn't the first thing you feel, love." She asked calmly, "Love, when your mother rests her hand on your back and holds you. Love is no façade Severus. It is as real as you and me." She paused for a second, and he soaked up her words. He wanted to agree with her. Tell her she was exactly right, but Severus Snape the dungeon bat, he would never do that.

"Hermione," He said, "My life has taught me one vital thing and that is: I came into this world alone. I shall leave it alone. And, if I have to live in it alone, so be it! I am content to live it in peace with myself." She ran his words over in her mind, trying to find the best way to reply.

"A person cannot go through life without love." She stated without doubt, "Or at least not without feeling it at one time or another. Whether that person is the giver, or the receiver. Everyone has loved or been loved."

This conversation was quickly getting her heated. She would debate this the whole night if she had to. How could he be so stupid. Didn't he see that people loved him. Dumbledore had been nothing but kind to him since he himself had been a student at Hogwarts. Minerva had always tried to make conversation with him in the Great Hall. Remus was always, always nice to him, no matter how cruel Severus had been in return. Harry even, he may not have particularly like Severus, but he had respected him and after the last battle had been at least civil towards him. Her face was flushed with the unreleased anger. Severus watched as her temper began to rise and he had had enough. He took advantage of the closeness of their bodies. Just as she was about to speak again, he threw all reserve out the window. He grabbed her chin and tilted her head up. For a moment he looked into her dark brown eyes, just a moment, before he pressed his lips to hers. It was a rush. Her lips were soft and he felt a million things at once, but the feeling that stood out was happiness. When had he last felt happy? Had he ever felt happy? It took a moment for him to register the fact that she was pushing her hands up against his chest. She was pushing him away. Quickly he threw himself back, and away from her. What had he done?

"Her-Hermione." He stared at her, shocked at what he had done. She looked back running the tips of her fingers over her lips, where his had been just seconds before. Quickly he stood up and started pacing. "What the hell was I thinking." He seemed to be talking to himself now. She stood up as well, the blanket falling in a puddle at her feet. She still held her fingers to her mouth, and she was biting her lower lip.

"Severus." She whispered.

"I must be the dumbest person alive."

"Severus." She said a little louder.

"What!" He shouted, and she jumped at his words. He looked at her tiny form and couldn't help but feel like this was her fault. He then continued on ranting, "How could I actually think that…that you. You could never…"

"Please stop." She asked.

"Stop…stop. I can't stop. You were my student, you're only twenty-two years old. I should have known better. No one could ever…"

"Severus…please." She managed to say through his rants, "I-I…I'm so tired."

"You should leave. You should leave right now."

"But…but I…" She was crying now and he couldn't bring himself to look at her. She could ask him anything and he would willingly oblige. He loved her, and she would be his undoing. "Just stop it. I-I can't deal with this. Not now."

"I…am…so stu-" But his words were cut short, because at that precise moment he felt Hermione's lips on his. It was quick, too quick, he barely had time to register it. Unfortunately he had no time to revel in his feeling of utter happiness, because as soon as it had ended Hermione collapsed in his arms.

Hee, hee, hee. I realized how long I was making you guys wait for the next chapter, so I figured I would reward you for your patience. Lemony goodness! I just couldn't wait for it anymore. I know it wasn't all that lemony, but it gets better. I'll update as soon as I can. Love ya's!  
---Britney

"**Here With Me" **_Dido_

I didn't hear you leave  
I wonder how am I still here  
And I don't want to move a thing  
It might change my memory

Oh I am what I am  
I'll do what I want  
But I can't hide  
I won't go  
I won't sleep  
I can't breathe  
Until you're resting here with me  
I won't leave  
I can't hide  
I cannot be  
Until you're resting here with me

I don't want to call my friends  
They might wake me from this dream  
And I can't leave this bed  
Risk forgetting all that's been

Oh I am what I am  
I'll do what I want  
But I can't hide  
I won't go  
I won't sleep  
I can't breathe  
Until you're resting here with me  
I won't leave  
I can't hide  
I cannot be  
Until you're resting here with me


	14. The Hospital Wing Again

He rushed into the room Dumbledore had given him not one week prior, slamming the door behind him.

"How dare she," Draco muttered to himself as he paced about the room, limping just a little bit. "How dare she defy _me_ like that. Filthy little-" He stopped short realizing what it was he was saying.

_What am I doing_? He asked himself, _I_ _sound like the old me. The third-year, arrogant, idiot me. _

"Oh God, what did I do tonight?" Once again he was talking to himself. He hadn't meant to act like such an asshole. He just wasn't used to women turning him down. "I've completely ruined any chance I could have had with Hermione." But that couldn't be. He wouldn't allow that statement to become true. He knew he just needed another chance. One more chance, and then she would see how sincere his feelings were. At least in his mind they were sincere.

He sat down on his tiny couch and settled into quiet contemplation. He had to fix this, he just had to. He would, but he didn't know how to go about doing it. He couldn't remember a time when he had ever actually apologized…for anything. He didn't just want her forgiveness. He wanted her to want him. And by God he was determined to do it. He would have no other. At least not until he had conquered Hermione. She would be the ultimate prize, and he would win her over, whatever the cost. He just had to keep his damn temper in check. How could he allow himself to lose his cool like that and be so…so…like his father. He couldn't, wouldn't allow that to happen ever again. If he did then knew he would never be able to live with himself. If he were to ever end up like Lucius he may very well have to take his own life. He would not let his temper stop him.

_There's nothing standing in my way. _He thought, _She will be mine…_

* * *

He didn't quite know what had just happened. He was almost sure he had just felt Hermione's lips on his, but he knew that could not be. It wasn't until the dead weight of Hermione's limp body registered with him that he became aware of his surroundings. Quickly he scooped her up into both arms and carried her over to the couch. It was amazing in how little time he had regained his strength. Not only had it been for Hermione's help, but, he thought, her presence had helped him along a great deal as well. He was rejuvenated, but not just in body. It was as if his soul had undergone a swift change. He knew his seclusion, and lack of contact with others had helped to deplete his energy. None of that mattered now, because she was there. What was he thinking, telling her to leave. That would have only hurt him, not her. He gently placed her down on the seat and examined her. It did not take him long to realize something was amiss and just as quickly as he had before, he scooped her up again. He acted as if he were carrying something as fragile as glass. He rushed out of the room with his robes billowing behind him. He ran so many things over in his mind, leaving his brain no room to go over the kiss he had just earlier experienced.

Within moments he found himself entering the hospital wing, and it did not take long for Madam Pomfrey to notice his presence. It also did not take long for her surprise to appear on her face. Not only was Snape making an appearance, but, it seemed, he was carrying an unconscious person. She had originally thought it was a student, but instantly recognized Hermione's face when she saw it. She let out a gasp before speaking.

"Miss Granger, but-but what…?"

"Excuse me Poppy," Snape hissed out, "But I do believe Miss Granger is in need of some assistance. So can you stop gaping and find me someplace to put her." The witch did not allow his rudeness to phase her. She had worked with him for many years, and found she had gotten quite used to it. Quickly, she bustled over to the nearest empty bed, and gestured for Severus to put Hermione down. She was surprised at how tenderly he did it, but she didn't have time to think about it. One look at Hermione and it was obvious something was wrong. She sat along the edge of the bed and began a quick examination of her features. Severus watched intently, his eyes following every move Poppy made.

"Why are her clothes wet?" She asked as she turned to look at Severus.

"She got caught out in the rain." He answered as if it was extremely obvious.

"Hm…" She said as she held Hermione's wrist, "Her pulse is weak, and her skin, extremely pale." Severus knew Poppy well enough to expect this from her. She had always spoken her thoughts out loud. At least when it came to tending a patient. "My goodness!" The nurse exclaimed. "This child is skin and bones. What has she been eating?" She inquired Severus now with a harsh glare. He was more concerned about the fact that Poppy had called Hermione a child. It only made him wince with embarrassment. His previous actions would most definitely have been looked down upon by someone like Poppy. Especially if she still considered Hermione a child.

"How should I know." He announced, "I don't keep an itinerary of the girl's food intake." He didn't catch on to what Poppy meant, but he began to realize when he saw the witch's expression. Soon he was sitting on the opposite side of the bed scrutinizing Hermione's appearance. It was plainly obvious that she had not been eating. Her skin was sallow, and so pale. Her body, as he had noticed before, was thin and frail. When she was up and standing it was less noticeable because of the way she carried herself. Her posture was always perfect, tricking the eye into believing there was more to her than there actually was. It almost brought a tear to his eye as he wondered why a girl as perfect as she would deprive herself of food. It was odd to him, but he knew there had to be a reason. The sound of her voice ran through his head…_never good enough_. He had overheard her say that not two nights ago. Why would she think that? He knew he could not ask questions now. Especially when they would not be answered.

"What can I do?" He asked Poppy, and the witch looked confused.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"To help Poppy." He said almost shouting. Hermione whimpered a bit, and not missing a beat, he lowered his voice. At least not before sighing. "What can I do to help."

"Nothing." She stated plainly. Now it was Severus' turn to be confused. "Nothing can be done Severus. At least not now, while she is sleeping. I'll keep her here for the night. She needs to be under a watchful eye." She paused for a moment, then continued, "So…Why don't you just go back to your rooms. I'm sure she'll-"

"No," Snape stated firmly, "I am going to stay here."

"But Severus, you yourself are not in the best of-"

"I said I was staying Poppy." He sighed, and Poppy, for the first and only time saw just how weary he really was. Seeing this weakness in him almost made her cry, and she wondered what it was that kept him at Hermione's side. She, without thinking, placed a hand gently on his shoulder. She was grateful he did not pull away. Instead he sat holding the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger.

"Fine Severus. If you wish to stay, it is not in my power to stop you." Poppy started to walk away, but she turned back around. "Oh, but do you think you could hold back from disturbing my other patients." It wasn't a question as so much of a command. He realized why she had said it when he saw her stroll over to a student. One who had obviously woken because of Snape's tone. Severus knew this because the child stared at him with a wide-eyed expression. A mixture of fear and awe. It almost brought a smile to his face. He still had it in him. Hermione hadn't driven all the malice out of him just yet. He made a sort-of laughing noise in the back of his throat. Quickly, though, the grimace was back on his face as his eyes scanned the whole of Hermione's fragile body. God, for being so smart she really was dumb. _The dumbest smart person he knew._ Again a smile threatened to creep onto his face, and again it did not succeed. _The most beautiful, talented, moody smart person he knew._ He ran all of her qualities through his head, and while there were some that would be bad, Severus had found them to be quite amusing. The sound of her voice used to drive him nuts. Like nails on a chalk board he used to say, but, it seemed, now when she talked he rather enjoyed it. And while she did have a habit of getting away from herself and talking too much, especially in heated discussions, he found it quite amusing, and dare he say cute. _Cute_, he'd be damned if he would ever use that word out loud, but in the sanctity of his mind he allowed it to pass.

Severus watched over Hermione's sleeping body for hours into the night. Every once and awhile Poppy would come to check on the two, always finding the same scene. A quiet, contemplative Severus sitting alongside Hermione's bed holding his head in his hands. At first glance you would think him to be sleeping, but if you were to look closer you would see his dark eyes, wide, and ever-watchful. At one point Poppy tried to make conversation with him, but it failed. He had quickly dismissed her, calling her a nuisance and a pain in the arse.

The moon was high in the sky, and Severus had just begun to drift off when he heard a familiar voice. One he could never forget, and one he would never wish to.

"Glad to see you two chatting it up." Said a scratchy, yet wise voice. It took Severus awhile to answer, but Dumbledore allowed him to take his time.

"One of my greatest annoyances in life, is seeing people speak to those who cannot hear them." Severus finally creaked out. Dumbledore stood behind him nodding his head.

"I suppose that would annoy you." He said, "But I assure you Severus they can hear you. And so can Miss Granger here."

"How can you be so sure." Severus asked, and in return received a chuckle from Dumbledore.

"Give an old man some credit here Severus. I know." The Headmaster said, "Just as I know you are in love with Miss Granger." Severus nearly choked when he said this.

"What!" He managed to exclaim without shouting.

"Oh come now Severus I may be dim-witted, but any old fool could see." He answered. After a long pause he spoke again. "Now tell me Severus, if I know that then can sleeping people hear you talk?" Again he paused and soon after Severus heard Dumbledore's cloak swoosh and a faint, almost whispered, "Goodnight Severus."

Under his breath so as to make sure no one heard him, Severus whispered a good night to the headmaster. He knew that if he didn't he wouldn't be able to sleep that night. If he slept at all. As he ran the Headmaster's words through his head he remembered a previous occurrence from that night, and he could only hope that, in the darkness, none of the stirring students could see his beaming smile.

* * *

This is short I know, but it was shorter before I reviewed it. I'm not really all that happy about it, but I felt bad for making you guys wait. Plus I've got a few readers threatening mutiny for leaving a cliffy in the last chapter. Hm I wonder what Draco has up his sleeve. Silly me for actually thinking he could be a good guy. No way I'd have no story, except for the whole hg/ss love thing. Alright everybody, do your duties as fanfic-ers and review. YAY!

**Paradise**_ Vanessa Carlton  
_Once upon a year gone by,  
She saw herself give in,  
Every time she closed her eyes,  
She saw what could have been.

Well nothing hurts,  
And nothing bleeds,  
With covers tucked in tight,  
Finally when the bottom drops out,  
She forgets to fight,  
To fight.

And it's one more day in paradise,  
One more day in paradise.

As darkness quickly steals the light,  
That shined within her eyes,  
She slowly swallows all her fear,  
And soothes her mind with light,

Well all she wants,  
And all she needs are reasons to survive,  
A day in which the sun will take her artificial light,  
Her light.

And it's one more day in paradise,  
One more day in paradise,  
It's one more day in paradise,  
One last chance to feel alright,  
Alright.

Don't pretend to,  
Hold it in,  
Just let it out,  
Don't pretend to,  
Hold it in,  
Just push it out,

Don't you try to,  
Hold it in,  
Just let it out,  
Don't you try to,  
Hold it in,  
Hold it in.

Ohh oh ohhh,  
Ohh oh ohhh,  
Ohh oh ohhh,  
Ohh oh ohhh,

One more day in paradise,  
One more day in paradise,  
It's one more day in paradise,  
One last chance to feel alright.

Once upon a year gone by,  
She saw herself give in,  
Every time she closed her eyes,  
She saw what could have been.


	15. Goodbye to Yesterday

He knew he had been a fool for not noticing it before. A pure and utter fool, but the truth was he had never noticed because it was not her body that had drawn him to her. Although women's bodies were quite nice to look at, Severus had never actually saw Hermione like that, in the physical sense. He had first been attracted to her mind. It had all started when he had caught her reading in his personal library. Not that it surprised him, she had always had a way of getting into things she shouldn't. What surprised him was the material she had been reading. He would have expected _Hogwarts: A History_, but certainly not _Macbeth_. When she had hummed the classics as she worked on him. He felt the tune flow through him, almost as if it was made for her to sing. For her to sing to him.

As the sun rose higher in the sky, it cast its light upon the parapets of Hogwarts castle. It would be another beautiful day, and for once Severus wished to spend it outside. He couldn't though. He had a duty to stay with Hermione, and he would not leave the infirmary until she did. He looked at her, and for what had to be the millionth time asked himself why. Why would she do it? How could she be so dumb? It was enough to make him angry. Yes. He was angry with her, and he would stay that way, he thought. That was until she began to stir. She smiled in a dreamy way, and Severus could not help himself from mimicking it. She had dreamt throughout the night. Bad dreams, dreams he himself knew too well. He had been there when she would sit up shaking, hair flying about her haphazardly. He had eased her back to sleep, whispering in her ear, brushing the hair off of her pallid face. And now as she turned about under the covers he watched her still. How could he ever be angry with her. He had so many questions to ask her. Questions other than why. He wanted to know her. He was curious what she was made of. What she believed, what she knew, what she craved. He wanted to know how to get under her skin, and where she was sensitive the most. He only wished that the previous nights occurrences did not put her off from him. His eyes were glazed over as he watched her from his seat. Both from the lack of sleep, and also because he was lost in thought.

"Severus," Hermione whispered. Quickly he snapped out of his reverie, and he shook his head to remove the last remnants of thought. Her voice was rough and scratchy. She sounded as if she had swallowed sandpaper. She tried to push herself up, but found that even with a good nights rest, she still had no strength left. She was annoyed with herself as her arms gave out from her. She sighed and watched as Severus stood up to grab a pitcher and a glass. He poured water into a glass and handed it to her.

"How do you feel," He asked as he helped her sit herself up. He fluffed her pillows and she sat back against them. She took a sip of her drink before answering. The liquid felt soothing as it flowed down her throat.

"Weak." Was all that she answered. Severus only nodded before turning and walking away. Before he could get far he heard Hermione's voice. "Where are you going?" She asked. He turned back around and stood at the foot of her bed.

"To fetch Madame Pomfrey. I'm sure she'll want to know you're up."

"No." She exclaimed. She seemed embarrassed by her sudden outburst, because a slight blush rose up on her pale face. She looked down at her hands a moment. "N-not yet."

Slowly Severus walked back to his chair and seated himself in it. He shifted it so he was seated close to her bed. He found he was afraid to look at her. Embarrassment was written all over his face, he knew it. After an awkward silence he couldn't take it anymore and he looked up, only to find her staring at him. Almost as intently as he had looked at her while she was sleeping.

"Her-" His words were stopped by her hand. She had placed it gently upon his lips.

"Shh. Do you know that you look very handsome when you're not scowling?" He couldn't help but smile at her silly flattery. "I said it before, but I'll say it again. It looks good on you." She said referring to his smile. Again with the flattery. He too looked down at his hands.

"I-I don't know what to say to you." He finally said.

"Then don't say anything." She whispered. Thoughts raced through her mind, but one that stood prominent was how she was seeing Severus right now. She really did think he looked handsome when he smiled. Especially with the sun casting its rays on his light skin. It made him look as if he was glowing with warmth. _Warmth_. She was cold, and a shiver ran down her back.

"You're cold." Severus said as he stood up. "I will be right back."

Hermione merely nodded, and looked away out the window as he walked away. He had been gone only a moment before she felt like crying. She was flattered by his attentiveness towards her. No one had ever been as attuned to her needs as he was being right now. She wanted him to hurry back. How was he doing this to her? She had been out of his presence for only a second before she missed him. She didn't know this feeling, and again the shiver ran down her back. There would be no hiding it for long, could she actually, possibly…love him? Was love even real? Never had anyone ever made her feel so comfortable. Not just in his presence, but in her own skin. She found herself holding her breath till he returned. When he did she released a loud sigh. He had a pile of blankets in his hands and he held them out to her. She took them graciously and started wrapping them around herself. It was obvious she needed some assistance and Severus leaned over her to tuck the blankets in tightly. His fingers grazed her arm as he did this, and again the shivers coursed through her body.

'_Damn it_,' She thought. She knew that it must have been obvious, but Severus took it for her just being cold. When she felt his body pulling away from hers she couldn't help herself. There was no way she was going to let this moment pass so quickly. She reached out and grabbed his arm before he could pull away fully, and take his seat. When she did this Severus released his own sigh of relief. He had just been wishing for her to do the very same thing.

"Don't." Was all she managed to say. He knew what she meant by this and instead of pulling away, he seated himself next to her on the right side bed. He could read in her eyes what she wanted him to do, and because he loved her, he complied. He leaned back against her pillows, and wrapped his arm around her. She laid her head gently upon his chest, and also wrapped her arm around him. And for the first time that day Hermione cried. He placed a silencing charm around them, not wanting to be disturbed by Poppy. He knew she would ask questions about why she was crying. He wouldn't let that happen. He would allow her to cry as long as she wanted to. There was a time and place for questions and this was not it.

After what seemed like hours Hermione began to calm down, and Severus found that he had a very strong urge to pee. As quietly as possible he mad to move from the bed, but stopped when he felt Hermione's body tense, and her hand grasped at his shirt.

"Where are you going?" She asked, "Don't leave." He pulled her closer to himself and kissed the top of her head.

"Hermione, there is something you need to know when it comes to me and you." He whispered into her hair, "I would never leave you, and nothing…nothing could ever keep me from you. I love you."

She turned her head up and looked at him. She searched his face for any sign of doubt and found none.

"I…love you too." She feared her hesitation would cause him not to believe her, but it dissipated as Severus brought his hand up to cup her face. Their lips met in the most passionate kiss either had ever experienced. Everything around them disappeared as they became one with each other. They were two parts of one whole. Hermione brought her arms up and placed them around his neck, as Severus tightened his grip around her waist, pulling her even closer to him. He ran his thin white fingers through her soft brown hair, and her body tingled in all the spots that he had touched her. This was the most natural magic that could ever have been created, and the two counted themselves lucky to be a part of it. Severus wanted to increase the kiss, but would not allow himself to take it further. He needed to wait until she was sure of her feelings. He would not take advantage of the vulnerable position she was in. Slowly, as to not surprise her, he pulled out of the kissed. It was quite possibly the hardest thing he had ever had to do.

They sat there staring at one another, trying to catch their breath. Severus smiled, and Hermione laughed a little.

"I can't help but think that Dumbledore had something to do with this. Indirectly of course, but nonetheless." Hermione said.

"I believe so too." Severus answered, "The old codger was in here last night telling me all about my feelings. It's scary how much that man knows."

"Well I'm sure he will be pleased to hear about this." Hermione said staring at her hands that she was now twisting together from nervousness.

"I suppose so." Severus replied. He stared at her intently before going on, "Hermione…"

"Severus, please," Hermione answered knowing what he was about to ask, "Don't. Don't ruin this moment by asking me about…"

"Okay." He said quickly, before she had time to get upset. "Alright, I understand." All of a sudden he found himself laughing and Hermione hit him playfully.

"Hey, I thought I told you not to laugh at me."

"It's not you I'm laughing at, it's myself." He answered, "You do realize that you could ask me for anything, anything at all and I would not be able to deny you. You're the only person in the world for whom I would go to the end of the earth."

This deserved him another kiss, and it was one that he received graciously. It was shorter this time, but just as nice. It had been cut off, though, by the very unfortunate barging in of Madame Pomfrey.

"Oh my!" She had shouted before practically running away. The two left in her wake could do nothing but laugh at the medi-witch's surprise.

"Well I don't think we'll have to worry about telling Albus." Said Hermione jokingly.

"Or anyone else for that matter," Severus added, but he was as serious as could be.

"I don't think she'll tell _everyone_."

"How long did you go to this school?" Severus asked lightheartedly, "I do believe that seven years at Hogwarts is long enough to justify my claim, that not only do the students here run their mouths, but the teachers and staff as well."

"I suppose," Hermione answered as she stretched her arms out from her sides, and released a wide yawn. Severus could only stare at her in adoration. She smiled back at him, as she settled her head back down on the pillow, and placed her arms at her sides. She knew she was so vulnerable at this point, not only physically, but emotionally as well, and it surprised her to find that she was not bothered by this. She didn't feel the need to put her guard up. She liked that feeling…was it stability. Whatever it was, it was nice. He sat on the edge of the bed, back straight, and it seemed as if he was waiting for something, or somebody. He gently grasped her hand and used his thumb to trace invisible circles upon her skin. Slowly he lowered his head and he gave her a quick kiss on the forehead. It felt almost reassuring to her, it was as if she was waiting for that kiss. Now that she had received it their relationship was solidified, that was if they had a relationship.

"I don't think anyone will have a problem with it." Hermione finally said after a few minutes.

"Oh yes I'm sure Minerva will be quite pleased with me."

"Oh yeah. I forgot about her. She'll have your head." Hermione said as she giggled, "I can see it now."

"I doubt you'll have to wait very long." Severus answered.

"Why's that?"

"Because here she comes now." Hermione leaned over the side of the bed to get a better view of her ex-transfiguration teacher, as she progressed towards them. McGonagall's expression was enough to scare even a boggart, and she was headed right towards them. There was no way out of this one, and the two could do nothing but sit there and wait for their condemnation.

* * *

Ooooooh! What's McGonagall gonna say. I guess you'll just have to find out next time huh! I totally deserve thanks for this chapter, I wrote it in practically twenty minutes. It is my present to you for making you wait so long. Yup I added two chapters instead of just one. Love me or hate me for it. R&R people. Bonjour for now. --Britney

**Twilight** _Vanessa Carlton  
_I was stained,  
With a role,  
In a day not my own,  
And as you walked into my life,  
You showed what needed to be shown  
And I always knew what was right,  
I just didn't know that I might,  
Peel away and choose to see with such a different sight.

And I will never see the sky the same way,  
And I will learn to say goodbye to yesterday,  
And I will never cease to fly if held down,  
And I will always reach too high,  
Cause I've seen,  
I've seen…twilight.

Never cared,  
Never wanted,  
Never sought to see what flaunted,  
So on purpose,  
So in my face,  
Couldn't see beyond my own place,  
And it was so easy,  
Not behold,  
What I could hold,  
But you taught me,  
That I could change whatever came within these shadowed days.

And I will never see the sky the same way,  
And I will learn to say goodbye to yesterday,  
And I will never cease to fly if held down,  
And I will always reach too high,  
Cause I've seen,  
Cause I've seen…

As the sun shines through,  
And pushes away and pushes ahead,  
Feel the warmth of blue,  
And leaves a chill instead,  
And I didn't know,  
That I could be so blind to all that is so real,  
But as illusion dies,  
I see there is so much to be revealed…

And I will never see _the_ sky the same way,  
And I will learn to say goodbye to yesterday,  
And I _will_ never cease to fly if held down,  
And I will always reach too high,  
Cause I've seen,  
I've seen…twilight.

I was stained,  
With a role,  
In a day not my own,  
And as you walked into my life,  
You showed what needed to be shown  
And I always knew what was right,  
I just didn't know that I might,  
Peel away and choose to see with such a different sight.

And I will never see the sky _the_ same way,  
And I will learn to say goodbye to yesterday,  
And I _will _never cease to fly if held down,  
And I will _always_ reach too high,  
Cause I've seen,  
I've seen…twilight.


	16. Run in With Minerva

Draco sat outside of Snape's rooms with his back against the wall. He had been waiting for at least twenty minutes. He had gone down to the dungeons to apologize to Hermione for his actions, and although he knew it to be folly he felt the need to do it anyway. After all that was the first step to winning her heart over. He had been waiting for them to come back, believing them to be at breakfast, but, it seemed, they were elsewhere. _'Otherwise they'd be back by now,'_ He thought to himself. Slowly he stood up, admitting defeat. He would just have to come back later, or maybe he would catch her somewhere else. He started the ascent up the stairs and couldn't help but wonder aloud once again.

"Where the hell are they?"

"Who?"

"Ah!" Draco screamed as he slipped on a step and landed on his butt. He raised his gaze to meet that of the unknown person. To Draco's surprise it was not a _person_ at all.

"Oh I'm so sorry. Did I scare you?" Sir Nicholas asked as he hovered over Malfoy's crumpled body. Draco leaned against his elbows, before speaking.

"Just a bit." He watched as Nearly Headless Nick's face turned slowly into a grimace when he recognized the boy. "Nice to see you Nicholas." The shock was clearly evident on the ghost's face, but being an aristocrat as he was, he quickly suppressed it.

"Is it really? I suppose I could say the same." Draco had to fight the smile that dared to creep onto his lips. It was slightly funny how many enemies he had made in his youth, and even funnier how many of them held grudges against him. He did get tired of explaining about why he had been such a dick though.

"How have you been Nicholas?"

"I've been dreadful actually." He stated clearly as he crossed his arms, "The monotony of life here has been taking its toll on me."

"Really." Draco was making his best attempt at pretending to be interested.

"Yes, and not just me. Some of the others (Draco assumed he meant the other ghosts) have felt the same way." He rambled on, "And, once again, my application for the Headless Hunt has been denied…" It went on in this fashion for some time, before Draco found it was time to excuse himself.

"I apologize Nicholas, but I really must be going."

"Oh, I'm so sorry my dear boy, yes, yes get along now. Nice talking with you."

"You too." As Draco was rounding the last flight of stairs he heard Nicholas calling after him. Draco couldn't help but roll his eyes before turning around.

"Yes Nicholas?"

"I'm sorry to impose a question like this, but the people you were looking for. Who might they be? I mean I just might be able to tell you where they are."

* * *

Hermione, and Severus could do nothing, but wait for the onslaught of accusations heading their way, in the form of a very angry Minerva McGonagall. There was no where to run, and certainly no where to hide. Severus did, for a split second, think about making an attempt at escape, but decided it was best to face this head on.

"Severus Snape, do explain yourself." Minerva shouted.

"Shh Minerva not so loud. You'll wake the other children." Madame Pomfrey whispered bravely. McGonagall only nodded, and Poppy sauntered off in another direction. Hermione was shocked at her transfiguration teacher's appearance. She looked absolutely disheveled. Her hair had been twisted up into its usual bun, but it looked as if it had been slept in. Pieces were sticking out haphazardly in every direction. Her robes had, obviously, just been thrown on, and her glasses were slightly askew upon the bridge of her nose. Her hands were in fists at her sides, and it looked as if her nails were digging into her palms painfully, but her anger would not allow her to feel such pain.

"Well!" Was all she managed to say in an angry whisper.

"Well _what _Minerva?" Severus answered still sitting on the bed. He held Hermione's hand, but in a spot where it could not be seen by McGonagall.

"Don't you dare." She answered leaning forward with her clenched fists behind her, "You know exactly _what_."

"I am afraid I don't and if there is one thing I have learned from women." He started, "That is that if they expect you of something, then you better figure out what that something is first before you go and start explaining. You may end up telling them something they don't know, and therefore getting yourself in more trouble." His nonchalant attitude was visibly getting on her nerves now, and still Hermione was shocked. Severus wasn't. If he had expected this kind of behavior from anyone, it was McGonagall.

"You were caught…"It seemed McGonagall was having trouble with the next word, but finally she managed to get it out, "_kissing._" As she said this she pointed her index finger back and forth between Hermione and Severus. He merely shook his head.

"Bloody hell news travels fast in this school." He said.

"Does it ever." Hermione answered in agreement. McGonagall looked up at her in awe.

"Y-you mean, you're actually agreeing with h-him." Again she pointed her wrinkly finger in Severus' direction, while looking at her star pupil. Or at least her ex-star pupil.

"Of course I am agreeing with him." Hermione wasn't sure where she had gotten her boldness, but she wasn't going to stop now. "It was just a innocent, regular kiss. It's not like anyone was dying." Again the shock was evident on McGonagall face.

"I-it was…consensual?"

"Of course it was," Severus shouted before Hermione could speak. He stood up as he continued talking. "What do you think I'm some pervert who is trying to take advantage of her?"

"W-well…yeah." McGonagall said nodding and Hermione had to hold back a laugh. Her expression was priceless, as was her last statement. She had actually just called Severus a perv, and Hermione had found it quite hilarious.

"How dare you." He said, "How dare you suspect me of something so-so preposterous."

"W-well, I," She started.

"I'd expect you to have some faith in me Minerva, and if not that then at least a little respect." Both Hermione and McGonagall watched as Severus paced back and forth within the confined space.

"Severus," Hermione whispered. She was still seated on the bed, but she had managed to sit herself up. "Severus," she said a little louder, but still he ignored her. It wasn't until she had said his name a third time that he had noticed her, but it may have been because she was trying to remove herself from the bed.

"Hermione, what do you think you're doing? Get back in that bed this instant."

"No Severus, I'm fine." She stated clearly as she tried to steady herself. He came up behind her and offered her the balance she needed, when he placed his hand gently on her back. "Professor." Hermione said with a sigh instantly catching McGonagall's attention. "I assure you everything here is alright, and that the kiss was consensual. I would expect you to understand that I am an adult now, and I am capable of making my own decisions. Now will you please allow Severus and I some time alone together. Obviously this little intrusion has given cause for great commotion, and I do believe he needs to be calmed down before we talk about anything else."

In her stunned silence all McGonagall could do was nod. It did take her quite awhile though. Slowly she turned on her heel and walked away. Severus helped Hermione climb back onto the bed, and then seated himself in his chair. He reached out and took Hermione's hand again. He knew, just as she did, that there were going to be questions. Not just about them, but about her condition. He was sure that by now everyone knew how sick Hermione was, and he knew that they owed it to Madame Pomfrey. How badly he wished to strangle her at the moment. He decided to count his blessings. Although it hadn't been fun having a run in with Minerva, it hadn't been all that bad either. He had definitely been involved in worse. There was no need to fret over a little argument. Especially when there were worse to come. Right now though, there were more important matters to be dealt with.

'_First and foremost,'_ Severus thought, _'Where the hell is the nearest bathroom?'_

* * *

When I re-read this chapter I almost fell asleep. It is so boring, but I needed it seeing how there are a few important details concerning Draco. I wanted to say something else, but I can't quite remember now. Oh well I'll think of it later. I just want to let you know if you're looking for a good book to read you should definitely pick up "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn." It's so good! Alrighty I'm out.

P.S. (Bonjour can be used as hello and goodbye, at least I thought it could. I don't know I never paid attention in French class. I took three years of it and the only thing I can say is the "Hail Mary," and "My name is Britney Sturm.")

* * *

**This is Your Life** _Switchfoot  
_Yesterday is a wrinkle on your forehead  
Yesterday is a promise that you've broken  
Don't close your eyes  
Don't close your eyes  
This is your life  
And today is all you've got now  
And today is all you'll ever have  
Don't close your eyes  
Don't close your eyes…

chorus  
This is your life  
Are you who you wanna be?  
This is your life  
Are you who you wanna be?  
This is your life  
Is it everything you dreamed that it  
Would be when the world was younger  
And you had everything to l-l-lose…

Yesterday is a kid in the corner  
Yesterday is dead and over  
And…

chorus

Don't close your eyes  
Don't close your eyes  
Don't close your eyes  
Don't close your eyes  
This is your life  
Are you who you wanna be  
This is your life  
Are you who you wanna be  
Yeah…

chorus

And you had everything to lose…


	17. Draco's Search Continues

Poppy had decided it would be alright for Severus to take Hermione back to his rooms, only after he had promised to bring her back down the next day for a proper check-up. After they had both given their consent to that, they started the long trek back to the dungeons. Severus had a sneaking suspicion that if it wasn't for Poppy's awkward feelings toward them she would have never allowed him to take Hermione away. Nevertheless he was happy she did. They took their time, and Severus remembered a situation that they had been in not to long ago, similar to this one. He had at that time admired Hermione's boldness, now he admired everything about her. He saw her as so many things, but all in all she could be summed up in a short sentence. She was a slender, frail creature with wondering eyes and a soft fluttery voice. Finally they made it to his rooms, and he chanced a quick glance at her before saying the password. Unfortunately that quick glance turned into a longing stare from both of them. Finally Hermione could no longer support herself and had to urge Severus to open the door.

They danced that night…

"Mr. Malfoy, what a surprise." Madame Pomfrey said as she saw Draco walk through the doors.

"Good day Madame Pomfrey. I was just wondering if I could speak with Miss Granger for a moment." He said putting on the charm.

"Oh I'm sorry to say she and Professor Snape have already left." She said, "Just about twenty minutes ago."

"Oh." He said his hopes deflating, "I keep on missing them. I guess I'll be off then."

"Goodbye Mr. Malfoy." Draco began to walk away until something caught his mind.

"Um, Madame Pomfrey, do you mind telling me exactly why they were here." He asked. Poppy who was not usually all that perceptive couldn't help but feel he was tryin to trick her.

"No I'm sorry Draco, that information is highly confidential." She answered turning around to walk away. "Although," she said stopping, "They were quite…_comfortable_ with each other. Good day Mr. Malfoy." With that she entered her office and shut the door. It wasn't in Poppy's nature to keep such a secret to herself. So no one could really blame her for letting it slip. Besides, in that school he would have known before the day was out.

Her last words had left a few questions floating around in Draco's head. What could she possibly mean by that? He shrugged and left the hospital wing. He was too tired to think about it, and he had to teach the next day. He would have plenty of time to think about it later.

When they had first entered the sitting room Hermione placed herself on the couch while Severus made up some tea. As they sipped in peaceful silence they listened to an old record player that Severus had magicked to work inside the castle walls.

"Severus." Hermione said after finishing her tea.

"Hm." He answered.

"Dance with me."

"Hermione, you know you can't dance. You can barely stand."

"I can do it if you hold me." She whispered. It took him only a second to acquiesce to her request. He stood up and placed himself in front of her. He extended his hand, and she gracefully placed hers upon it. With ease he pulled her up into his arms. He almost wept, when he felt just how frail she was beneath her clothing, but he would not. For tonight was her night. Tomorrow would be the time for questions, but now she wanted to dance.

He held her close, and with his arms wrapped around her waist he supported her. She had placed her arms tentatively around his neck, and rested her head on his shoulder as they swayed slowly with the old jazz and blues beat. It was hard for her to keep her head in that place, because she found it rather difficult to stop looking at him. In her eyes he was tall, slender, and dark with his long black hair that curled at the nape of his neck, and his deep brown eyes. His nose, although a prominent feature, no longer seemed so imposing. Now it came off rather aristocratic, so to speak. His shoulders were broad and square, and even though he did not yet belong to her, Hermione was proud of him. Proud of his intelligence. She was surprised that she had not seen before, just how similar they were to one another. It really wasn't too much of a shock that they should be with each other. For there were no better two, fit to be together then they were. She felt his chest expand as he breathed in deeply.

He placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head, and then he closed his eyes. He allowed that moment to seep into his every pore. Never would he forget it, even if he wished to. That memory would last him forever, and he took joy in that. It was still just so hard for him to believe that this…beautiful, young woman was in his arms and she wasn't pushing him away. She was willing to let him hold her, she was willing to let him kiss her. if anyone had told him a few years ago, that he would be there holding Hermione Granger in his arms, and loving every minute of it, he would have thought them to be insane. Yet there he was doing just that. They danced for a few more hours after that before Hermione's weariness got the best of her.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" Severus asked her. He didn't mean to imply anything by the question, he just simply wanted her there, next to him. Before he could open his mouth to explain this she nodded her head. He knew that she understood what he meant.

"Let me just get changed and I will join you in a moment." With that he helped Hermione walk slowly into the bathroom, with a bundle of clothing, and shut the door behind her.

Severus immediately went into his room and removed his layers of robes until he was down to his black fitted pants and his white blouse shirt. A few minutes later Hermione came out of the bathroom in her pajamas. A white tank top and loose black pants that were made of fleece. They were her favorite, most comfortable pajama pants, and she was almost sure Severus would love them for the color. He had been sitting on the edge of his bed facing the window. He rubbed his neck, and winced a bit from the pain. Quickly and quietly Hermione crawled up onto the bed and situated herself behind him. Starting from his waist and moving upward, she began massaging for him. Surprised by her hands on his back he jumped and it made Hermione smile.

"Don't be startled," She whispered into his ear, "it's only me dear heart."

He turned his head to the side a bit when she said that. She had called him dear heart. She moved her small hands on up his back and he eased into her touch. She loved the feel of his skin on her hands. Just to touch him was like a dream come true. It wasn't until that moment that she realized just how much she had longed to touch him in that way. With love. When she had gotten up to his neck and had deemed herself finished, she slid her hands down Severus' front and hugged him from behind. She rested her tired head on his shoulder, and smiled to herself. He turned, slowly, as not to startle her, and took her hands into his. He leaned close to her face, which looked the picture of innocence. Her eyes were wide with wonderment, and her lips full and pouty as they always were.

"I love you Hermione Jane Granger." He whispered to her.

Her eyes fluttered closed as he said this, and she knew it was for real, because she felt her heart flutter as well. Words were lost to her in that moment, and she found herself to be in fear. She had never been at a loss for words before. There was something she was supposed to say, but she couldn't remember. His last statement had driven every sane thought from her head. Only one word came to mind, and she said it before she had time to think about it.

"Ditto." He smiled at her response, then he grabbed her chin and kissed her nose. "Where are you going?" Hermione asked as Severus began to rise from the bed.

"I'm going to take a shower." He answered, "Just make yourself comfortable. I'll be out soon."

Hermione nodded and he kissed her again, this time on the lips, before he went into the bathroom. After he had shut the door behind him she pulled back the comforter, and sheets on the bed. She felt cold and the warmth of the blankets was inviting. She curled up under them and before her head had hit the pillow she fell asleep.

That was how he found her. Curled up in a little ball under the covers. _His covers_, on _his bed._ How odd was fate that he should find himself here with her. He watched her for awhile before he himself climbed under the covers.

"_Knox_." He said turning out the lights. He inched as close to her as possible and wrapped his arm around her. She, in her sleepy way, did the same. She slid her arm up and around his, and just as they had before, they held each other.

"Ditto," He whispered laughing to himself. What a word. He closed his eyes and fell asleep with a smile on his face. He had never slept better.


	18. An Unexpected Proposal

Hermione awoke the next day with a smile on her face. Severus wasn't there so she curled up under the covers never wanting to move, but the uncertainty of where he went made her crawl out of bed. When her bare feet hit the cold stone floor a shiver went down her spine. She was freezing. She grabbed a sweater and pulled it on as quickly as she could. She also grabbed a pair of Severus' socks and put them on. She went into the bathroom and washed up her face before going out into the sitting room. She passed her little cot on the way and laughed. It hadn't been long before when Severus had yelled at her for sleeping in the same room as him. How ironic was it that she had just slept in _his_ bed with _him_ right next to her.

"Severus." She said sleepily before she walked out into the sitting room.

"Good morning." Severus said when she came in.

He had been reading again. Before him lay a tray of food. It seemed he hadn't touched a thing. He had been waiting for her.

"Morning." She said warily.

"Did you sleep well." He asked.

He was wearing the glasses again and Hermione loved it.

"The best sleep I've ever had." She answered as she sat down next to him on the couch.

She leaned over and kissed him sweetly on the mouth. He graciously returned the favor. She pulled away and looked into his eyes. They were deep and farseeing. It didn't take her long to start kissing him again. This time it was deeper. He dropped his book on the floor and grabbed the sides of her face. He pulled her closer to him. She ran her hands up his chest and rested them at the nape of his neck. It was more intense than anything she had ever felt, and it was like a drug. She wanted more.

"Wait." Severus said as they parted lips for a moment. "Wait Hermione really."

He pulled back and held her away from him. She couldn't help but feel hurt and her eyes showed it. She knew she was radiating her feelings so she looked down at her hands. She was embarrassed, and she wondered if he was beginning to have second thoughts.

"Hermione look at me." He said as he gently took her chin. "Don't be hurt. Please. We need to talk."

"Well those are four words I never wished to hear from you." She said.

"Please Hermione this is important." He answered as softly as he could. "You know what I'm talking about. We will have to discuss it sooner or later."

She didn't want to admit that he was right, but he was. If they didn't talk about it now then it would be a burden.

"Alright." She whispered.

"Eat first then we will talk."

"Severus."

"Please." He said.

She sighed and turned toward the tray. She grabbed the tiniest thing she could find. Starvation is a disease. It's a mindset, and Hermione had the strongest mind out of any of her peers. She wouldn't be healed overnight. She took a deep breath before shoving a piece of toast in her mouth.

"Good." Severus said as he watched her.

She threw the rest of the bread back onto the tray.

"Severus I can't do this with you watching me."

"Why?" He asked. He didn't understand anything about it.

"Because I feel like you're scrutinizing me."

"I'm not Hermione." He said. "I'm trying to help you."

"I-I know." She said and she put her head in her hands and cried.

He grabbed her quickly and pulled her into a tight hug.

"Hermione, no matter what I will always want the best for you. I've never scrutinized you as you say."

"Ha." She laughed. "Oh no."

"When have I ever?" he asked looking into her streaming eyes.

"How about everyday for seven years. Does that sound about right?"

"What here at school." He asked.

She looked at him as if he were the biggest fool in the world.

"Yeah." She said curtly.

"Hermione." He said. "There's something I need to tell you so that you do not misunderstand. I have always loved you. It's just, it wasn't until recently that realized it. I acted like a little school boy when you were my student, because of that reason. I admired you, respected you. I treated you harshly only so that you would make something of yourself. Only because I knew that there were people out there that would treat you just the same. I wanted to prepare you for it. I wanted you to be the best."

She smiled up at him.

"You always loved me." She said, "Even then."

"Yes." He said smiling back. "And nothing you could ever do will change how I feel.

He had no idea how his words made her feel. In a small way they healed her. she knew that she hadn't been the most attractive thing when she was young or even now, but he had loved her regardless. So what would the difference be if she still had looked the same. He would have loved her anyway. She finally felt as if her appearance made no difference.

"I love you." She said as she laid her head on his shoulder and continued to cry.

"I've hoped for so long to hear you say that." He said cupping her face.

She ate a little more after that and Severus knew it was all he could hope for on her first day of recovery.

"Hermione can I ask you something"

"It depends." Hermione answered.

"Why?" He asked. He didn't need to say more, she knew what he meant.

"Severus…have you ever felt incomplete? Unworthy? Lost?" She asked him. He nodded. "I've felt all those things and more for some time now. I lost control of my life amidst these feelings. I was failing at University. My work was slipping, but then I found something I could control. I found something that I could turn into a goal. As long as I achieved this goal daily everything else in my life would fall back into place. It gave me a false happiness. That is why."

He nodded as she talked. He was no longer as confused as he had been before but he was still in a state of shock. She was perfect yet so flawed in her own eyes. How could she not see it? He feared these things would haunt him forever and he knew that the only way to get rid of them was to move on. They both needed to move on. Together. He wanted to tell her these things, but he couldn't figure out how to put them into words. Instead he showed her.

He kissed her firmly. Her lips were salty from her tears and it only made the experience more intimate. He pulled away for a second and whispered gently in her ear.

"You're perfect."

With that she started bawling again and he hugged her tightly. She hugged him back as if she would never let go. She needed him.

"What should we do today?" He asked her as he tucked loose strands of her hair behind her ear.

"A walk." Hermione whispered.

"Are you up for it?" Severus replied.

"If you're there I can do anything."

It would be a beautiful day. The sun was shining and the sky was clear and on a clear day you can see forever. Severus could see forever. He could see himself marrying Hermione. He could see himself with her as she sat on a porch heavy with child. He could see himself in 50 years sitting with her and his grandchildren. He saw all these things in his mind and instantly knew they were true. Never had he seen something so clearly.

Together they walked hand in hand out to the gardens of Hogwarts. Students and passers by watched in awe. To see the cold, hard potions master actually showing emotion was something to be astonished by. Hermione wore a loosely fitting pair of jeans and a gray sweatshirt. She had her hair thrown up into a loose bun. She had most of her energy back, and so did he. Emotionally he felt better than ever. They talked about nothing and everything.

"Severus, do you ever want to have children." Hermione asked.

"You know I never really thought I did, but now…"He answered. "Yes. I would love to have children."

"I've always wanted children." Hermione said, "Ever since I was little."

"I'd have to say you would make a very excellent mother." Severus said.

Hermione smiled at him and squeezed his hand.

"You think so?" She asked.

"I do." He answered, "I doubt there's anyone more responsible or qualified to be a mother. After all you did take care of Potter and Weasley for all those years, and those two were by far more work than five infants."

"I guess you're right." She said laughing. After she had stopped giggling silence took over. It was a nice, comfortable silence. Finally she spoke up again. "They weren't really as bad as you thought you know. Harry and Ron. They were just…difficult at times. Strong-headed. But they were good to me."

"I know that." He said as he kissed the top of her head. "They would've been fools not to be."

Again the silence took over. It seemed with every step they took their bodies got closer and closer and they couldn't stop touching. One would kiss the other, or one would squeeze the others hand. It was plain to see they were in love. Plain for everyone to see.

"Hermione." Severus said.

"Hm." Hermione answered absentmindedly.

"I want to have children." He said.

"I know Severus you told me." She replied.

"No, no I mean…" He paused to sigh. "I want to have children with you."

She stopped walking and slowly raised her gaze to his.

"Y-you mean…"

"What I mean is," Severus said as he stepped in front of her. He grabbed her arms gently, "I want to be with you. I want to live with you. I want to marry you. I want to know that you are mine, forever. I love you Hermione, with all of my heart. I want you to belong to me, and I to you. I want you to be my wife."

"B-but Severus…it's so sudden. I mean we…"

"I know, but can you honestly tell me that you don't feel the same way. Do you really think that it wouldn't work out. I know it would." He said.

"I-I." Severus stood there more terrified then he had ever been. He didn't know what he would do if she denied him. "I love you."

With that she stretched up and wrapped her arms around his neck. Their kiss mixed with Hermione's tears which were now streaming freely from her eyes. He placed his arm around her back and pulled her closer to him while his other hand worked its way up into her hair. Their faces were both flushed when they pulled away from each other, and they were breathing heavily.

"Are you sure." Severus asked her as he kept himself at a distance.

"Never have I been more sure about anything."


	19. Missing You

Pee Esss:  
Natsuyori: That last line in chapter 16 was for you. lol.  
BabyRuth15: idk about the nobody dying thing i've had this idea in my head for months.  
MackenzieW: Thanks for making me feel like an idiot. Just kidding.  
Smiles28: Thanks for the french lesson.  
BelladonnaWeasley: I miss you lol. So i decided to feed the SSHG addicts.  
MoonbeamDreamer: I also miss you.

To Everyone: SO SORRY I haven't updated in so long. My laptop's battery died and I had to wait to get it back. Luckily these two new chapters were still intact. Enjoy and I'll try, try, try to update as soon as I can. Unfortunately I'm going to be down the shore for a bit, but I hope these new chappies will keep you at bay.

Now on another note. Due to the HBP I've been wondering whether I should continue or not, but I've decided I will keep on keepin' on and finish this story. I don't know about you, but I was seriously upset about...well I don't want to ruin it for anybody, but for those of you who read it. You know what I'm talking about. Nevertheless I'm clinging to the hope that everything will turn out as a misunderstanding, or something of the sort. Okay I love you all. REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW. 


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